


The First Five Years

by Thursdays_Angel



Series: Picking Up the Pieces [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Anxiety, Brodinsons, Depression, Flashbacks, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Morgan Stark is a cutie, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicidal Thoughts, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-03-17 23:40:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 36,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18974716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thursdays_Angel/pseuds/Thursdays_Angel
Summary: A look into the lives of Thor and Loki during the five year gap at the beginning of Endgame.





	1. First Year - Part One

**Author's Note:**

> Just a reminder, I have no beta so all mistakes are my own. I want to note that the scenes don't necessarily flow into each other. There are time jumps here and there. Tags will be added as I update and I'm hoping to update at least once a week. Unfortunately there are no promises. However I will probably have chapter 2 up later today or tomorrow.
> 
> One of my pet peeves about Endgame was the way they treated Thor's depression and anxiety. They turned it into a joke and while I don't personally suffer from either I do have family who do. If it wasn't taken seriously I probably would have buried my little sister years ago. As it is I'm lucky that she's receiving the treatment she needs. People who suffer from those have good days and bad days so Thor's not going to be all angst throughout the entire work. I can't wait until I can introduce Morgan because she's going to have everyone wrapped around her little fingers.
> 
> It was obvious in the movie that Thor had no support network whatsoever. I've introduced that and even with that he is still going to turn to the bottle. I don't plan on having him end up at all like we saw him in Endgame though. I've tagged suicidal thoughts just as a precaution. 
> 
> Lastly, if there are any glaring mistakes please let me know. Thank you all and enjoy.

**_ The First Five Years _ **

**First Year – Part One**

            Loki stood beside the bed staring down at his brother. It had been nearly four days since his return from confronting Thanos. Four days since he had apparently killed the titan and four days since he had left the bed.

            Loki didn’t know what to make of the recent events. The wave of relief he’d felt upon hearing that Thanos was dead was so powerful his legs had given out upon hearing the news. He was truly safe from the titan’s wrath.

            The rest of the group who had gone out after Thanos had returned the day after Thor had. There was an air of defeat attached to their victory. Thanos had still won in the end, having made sure there was no way to reverse his destruction.

            Loki perched on the bed beside the mass that was his brother and laid a hand against what he hoped was Thor’s shoulder, shaking it gently. “Brother?”

            Thor groaned, he pulled the covers further over his head but made no further move to acknowledge Loki.

            “Thor please, you need to get up.”

            “Leave me be Loki.”

            “No. Laying here constantly is doing you no good. And quite frankly Thor, you smell.”

            Thor shifted, rolling over so that he could glare properly at Loki. At least it was some kind of reaction. The only downside was that it made the smell of Thor’s body odor worse. “I’m fine.”

            Loki wrinkled his nose in disgust. “No, you aren’t. This melancholy is doing you no good. There are things we need to do. I have asked Lady Danvers if she would search for our people and she has agreed. We need to locate a place for us to stay once they are found.”

            “We can stay here.”

            Loki sighed in frustration. “While this complex is large it is not going to be enough for our people. We need our own land. They will need their king.”

            “Then you do it, you be king.” Thor said turning his face back into the pillow.

            “What?” asked Loki incredulously. He couldn’t possibly have heard that right.

            “You be the king. You have more experience at it than I do.”

            “I never actually wanted the throne Thor, you know that. _You_ are king.”

            Thor shook his head, “No. I’m a terrible king.” He yawned, “I’m tired Loki.”

            “You have been sleeping for _four days._ ” Loki stood, “You know what, fine,” he threw up his hands in anger. “I’m leaving.”

            “ _No!_ ” Thor’s cry made Loki turn around in alarm. Thor reached for him, a look of panic in his eyes. “Don’t leave. Please, please don’t leave.”

            Loki stared at his brother in shock. “I thought you wanted me to leave you be.”

            Thor shook his head frantically, reaching out and grabbing Loki’s wrist tightly. “No, no, you can’t leave. You can’t leave me.”

            Loki sat back down as Thor’s breaths became more erratic. Thor started to shake and his eyes darted around the room. Loki could barely make out him repeating, “you can’t, you can’t, you can’t.”

            Loki gripped Thor’s hands to keep his fingers from clenching and unclenching. It took him a moment to get Thor to focus his gaze on him. He had never seen this kind of behavior in his brother. It frightened him. “Brother, I’m not… I’m not _leaving_ , leaving. I was just going to another room.”

            Thor had begun to sweat and all color had drained from his face. “Oh but… but you said…” Thor was having a hard time catching his breath and he pulled one hand away to tug at his shirt. “I-I can’t… b-breathe…”

            “Yes you can,” Loki said fighting to remain calm. “Breathe with me.” Loki slowly inhaled then exhaled, repeating the action. He made sure to hold eye contact with Thor. “Slow deep breaths, you can do it.”

            Loki watched Thor struggle to match his rhythm. Tears ran down Thor’s cheeks but eventually his breathing began to even out. He scooted forward until he could lay his head against Loki’s chest. Loki ran his fingers through Thor’s sweat soaked hair. His brother continued to shake and every once in a while he would cough. Thor’s eyes drooped as the shaking slowly lessened.

            Loki’s back began to ache from the way he was sitting. He shifted to try to get more comfortable but Thor’s grip on him tightened before he could. “This isn’t exactly comfortable brother.”

            “I can hear your heart,” Thor replied breathlessly, his whole body going limp.

            Loki didn’t have anything to say to that. He resigned himself to a sore back. They stayed like that for a while and Loki began to think Thor had fallen asleep. He tilted his head in an attempt to see Thor’s face but was unable to do so. “Thor?” he asked softly.

            “Hm?”

            Ah, so Thor was awake. “Brother, what was that?”

            “I don’t know,” Thor replied.

            “Has this ever happened before?”

            Thor remained silent for a time. “Never this badly,” he eventually replied.

            “But it has happened before.”

            Thor nodded against Loki’s chest. With a sigh he said, “I thought it was a temporary ailment.”

            “When did it start?”

            “After the Snap. Maybe before. So much was happening between the _Statesman_ and the Snap that I don’t think I noticed it. Sometimes I shake and get light headed. I can’t control it.”

            “You’re frightened for seemingly no reason and cannot rationalize it to the current situation. Does that sound about right?”

            Thor finally pulled back to look up at Loki. “Yes. How did you know?”

            “Because I have felt that before myself. I was able to hide my symptoms behind my illusions.” He shrugged one shoulder. “I also had few visitors while in my cell so it was pretty easy to hide.”

            “How did you overcome it?”

            “I didn’t,” he replied honestly. “The attacks became fewer over time. My last one was when Stark rescued me. Though my last memory before that was Thanos killing me so it was probably justified.” Loki tilted his head as he studied his brother. “Are you feeling better?”

            Thor sat up fully, “I think so.”

            “Do you believe you could take a shower? You really do smell terrible.”

            Thor huffed a laugh. “I suppose I could try.”

            “Good because the only other option would be to, I believe the phrase is, take you out back and hose you down.”

            “You... will be here when I get out?”

            His brother’s fear tugged at Loki’s heart. “Yes Thor, I will be here.”

            Thor gave him a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He finally left the bed and Loki watched him disappear into the bathroom.

            Loki looked at the mess that was the bed. He stood and used his seiðr to refresh the sheets and remake the bed. Loki worried at his lip in thought. He’d never imagined that anything could bring the Mighty Thor so low. To see such a thing was disconcerting to say the least. As children, other than their mother, Thor had always been the one Loki had gone to for comfort. Loki wasn’t sure how he would handle being the one to give comfort. It wasn’t something anyone had ever asked of him.

            Thor emerged from the bathroom a short time later. His shoulders still drooped with a heaviness Loki could not see but his brother did look a little better. Thor caught his gaze, “happy?”

            Loki shrugged. “You smell better,” he quipped. After a moment he asked, “Do you feel any better?”

            Thor shrugged as he began to dress. The clothes he chose were big on him. _His own form of comfort,_ Loki thought.

            “A little,” Thor finally replied. “I am still exhausted though I don’t understand why.” Once dressed he sat heavily beside Loki. “All I want to do is sleep.”

            “I remember the attacks would wear me out. I never allowed myself to sleep afterwards though. I never knew if I was safe.” He saw Thor flinch slightly with that knowledge. Loki didn’t want to add more guilt to what Thor already felt himself burdened with. “My situation was not your fault.”

            “I should have seen—” Thor began.

            Loki cut him off, “I didn’t let you Thor. I made sure no one could see my weakness. Which is not to say that what you are suffering is any form of weakness. My situation was completely different from yours.”

            Thor didn’t look at all convinced but he didn’t say anything either. The two sat in silence for a time. Loki suddenly stood and grabbed Thor’s arm. “Come with me.”

            He practically dragged Thor through the compound until they were out in the courtyard. Loki stopped at a spot where light had broken through the clouds. Grabbing Thor’s chin he tipped his brother’s head up. “Look.”

            Thor jerked away and blinked his eyes rapidly. “What was that for? Are you trying to blind me further?”

            Loki rolled his eyes. “No you oaf. Look,” he gestured at the area around them.

            “What am I supposed to be looking at?” Thor asked in exasperation.

            “The sun, Thor.”

            Thor gave a start, truly taking in their surroundings. A beam of sunlight had broken through the clouds to alight upon the courtyard.

            “You see brother,” Loki said fondly, “the sun does shine on us again.”

            The fact he got Thor to smile was worth the tackle hug he received.

* * *

            _You are a failure_ , the voice spoke from the ether. _You fail and countless lives are lost._

            Thor rubbed at his temples wishing the voice in his head would just _shut up_! It had gotten worse over the past few weeks. He’d done his best to keep his growing melancholy from his brother but Thor feared he wouldn’t be able to much longer. Loki was far more observant than Thor would have liked.

            Like any other day recently, the streets were empty. As far as he could tell there were only a handful of people currently residing on the street he was walking down. Many had either been killed during battle or were part of the Vanished. Even after so long there were still people unaccounted for.

            _And whose fault is that? How many families have you destroyed because your aim was too far to the right?_

            Sometimes the voice he heard was his own while other times it would sound like someone he had lost. Occasionally it sounded like his brother. That was one of the worst voices to hear, especially when he was hearing it while Loki was in the room with him. He wondered if Loki did blame him for their current situation.

            There had been no news about the remnants of their people and honestly Thor feared the worst.

            _All of Asgard destroyed and her people reduced to nothing because of you. Why are you even here?_

            Thor stopped on the empty street. This wasn’t the first time he’d asked himself that very same question. What good was he anyway? Who benefitted from his being here? Valhalla was closed to him forever due to his failure. He knew he was destined for Hel.

            This time it was his own voice that asked, _could you really do that to Loki?_

            He knew the answer to that easily. He couldn’t do that to his brother, not after everything Loki had been through.

            Thunder rumbled in the distance. He didn’t know if it was because of him or simply a natural weather occurrence. There had been more storms around him of late. _Everything you do does harm to those around you._

            “Shut up,” he hissed to the empty air. If there had been anyone around to witness his outburst they may think him mad. He needed a way to silence the voice.

            He would find no answers here. He decided to return to the house.

            He and Loki had been staying with Stark for the last couple of weeks. Stark had offered them lodging since it appeared as if none of the Avengers planned on staying together. He wondered what his part was in their breaking up.

            Upon arriving back at Stark’s surprisingly modest lodgings Thor was pleased to see no one around. A spike of anxiety ran through him when he didn’t immediately see Loki. Then he remembered that he and Stark had gone out to acquire… something.

            _You’re worthless. Nothing but a burden to those around you._

            Thor grit his teeth, slamming the door behind him as he entered the house. “Shut up, shut up, _shut up_.”

            He wandered the house with no particular destination in mind. He eventually found himself in the cellar and realized Stark had a fully stocked liquor cabinet. Grabbing a bottle at random he began to drink. Maybe, with enough liquor, the voice would stop.

* * *

            That was how Loki found his brother upon his return from running errands with Stark, laying passed out on the floor of the basement. The smell of alcohol of was atrocious and he nearly tripped over one of the many bottles strewn about. Looking at what had once been an impressive liquor collection he wondered if it was possible for Thor to develop alcohol poisoning from Midgardian spirits. He hoped not and while it may make him a terrible person, he sincerely hoped Thor developed a nasty hangover. It would serve him right.

            Loki carefully made his way over to his brother, kicking the occasional bottle out of his way. “Thor!” he yelled.

            Thor sat up with a cry then proceeded to grip his head in pain. “Ow.”

            “What’s wrong brother?” Loki asked, making sure his voice was rather loud. “Headache?”

            Thor cracked an eye open. “I hate you so much right now,” he groaned.

            With a flick of Loki’s fingers all of the lights turned on. Thor dropped back to the floor and covered his head.

            Loki hid his worry, which really wasn’t that hard since Thor was currently trying to bury his head in the floor. He’d seen Thor drink occasionally since his return but this was the first time he’d seen his brother go on a bender. It was a development he was not in any way glad to see.

            He knelt beside Thor and placed his hand against his brother’s head. He used his seiðr to relieve some of Thor’s pain. Just enough that Thor would be able to look at him without getting sick. “What is all this?” he asked, gesturing to the decimated liquor cabinet.

            Thor looked around at the room, seemingly for the first time realizing the state of it. He then looked back at Loki, sitting up and poked at his arm. “Solid,” he murmured.

            Warily Loki said, “Yes… How drunk are you?”

            Thor’s features scrunched in distaste. “Not drunk enough. I can still hear it.”

            “Hear what?”

            “You. I can still hear you.”

            “Well I would hope so.”

            “Why can I hear you?”

            “Because I’m sitting right beside you.” Thor’s behavior had gone from worrying to downright frightening. “I know I annoy you sometimes but—”

            “You’re dead.”

            Loki looked at Thor as if he’d suddenly sprouted a second head. “What?”

            “You’re dead and it’s my fault.” Thor gripped at his head and pulled at his short strands, “but I can still hear you.”

            Loki shifted so he was kneeling in front of his brother and gently pulled Thor’s hands from his hair lest he hurt himself. “Why do you think I’m dead?”

            “Because he… he strangled you and broke your neck.” Tears welled in Thor’s eyes before silently running down his cheeks. “I wanted to help you but I couldn’t. You died thinking I hated you…” He curled up, burying his head against his knees. “It’s my fault.”

            Loki didn’t know what to say to that other than, “Thor I... I’m not dead.” Was it possible that Thor was hallucinating? He looked once more at the amount of empty bottles strewn about. Yes, it was definitely possible. How could he snap his brother out of it?

            Thor’s whole body shuddered and he pressed his hands against his head again, covering his ears. “Please stop.”

            Loki realized he needed help. “Stark!” he called. Not sure if he was actually heard, he sent a simulacrum after the man.

            A minute later he heard Stark enter the cellar. Loki turned and saw the man taking in the state of the room. His eyebrows shooting up in shock. “Wow... you know, I’m not even mad. This is impressive.”

            Loki shot the man a glare. That wasn’t helpful at all. “He won’t listen to me.”

            Stark moved over to kneel beside Thor as well. He placed a hand on Thor’s shoulder. “Thor? What’s with the uh... impressive amount of drinking?”

            Thor peeked an eye up, looking at Loki warily before turning his gaze fully on Stark. “I want it to stop.”

            “Want what to stop?”

            “Everything.”

            “Okay… you’re going to have to be a little more specific.”

            “He thinks I’m dead,” said Loki.

            Stark shot him a confused look of his own. “Is that it?” He asked Thor, “Do you think you’re seeing Loki’s ghost?”

            Thor nodded, grabbing at his hair again. “I can hear his voice and I see him everywhere.”

            “Okay, what’s he been saying?”

            Loki began to ask Stark where he was going with this but the man held up a finger to wait a minute. Frustration began to overwhelm Loki, he didn’t know where any of this was coming from and quite frankly it frightened him.

            “It’s my fault,” Thor sobbed. “He says it’s my fault that he’s dead. It’s my fault that _everyone_ is dead.”

            Loki felt his chest tighten at his brother’s words. He’d said no such thing but that Thor believed he had… it hurt more than he’d expected. “Thor,” he began.

            “Hold on a sec,” Stark said, placing a hand on his shoulder. He turned his attention back to Thor. “Do you remember what happened on my way back from Titan? Do you remember who I found?”

            Thor’s brow furrowed and it seemed like it took him a moment to think. “You… you found the wreckage of my people.”

            “Right, what else?”

            “You found Loki.”

            Stark nodded, “Uh huh and I picked him up, didn’t I?”

            Slowly, Thor lowered his hands and focused tear-filled on Stark. “You brought him back.”

            “That’s right,” Stark said with a smile.

            Thor’s eyes turned to Loki then back to Stark. “You can see him?” he whispered, unsure.

            Stark poked Loki in the arm. “Sure can. I can touch him too,” he poked Loki again for emphasis, “see.”

            “I…” Thor slowly uncurled himself and carefully reached out towards Loki.

            Loki took his brother’s hand and squeezed gently. “I’m here brother, and I’m _fine_.”

            Before Loki could brace himself, Thor surged forward to embrace him. Loki lost his balance and they both ended up lying on the floor. Thor head was buried under Loki’s chin and he breathed a sigh of relief. “I-I dreamt you had truly died. It was s-so real.”

            Loki hugged Thor back, glancing worriedly at Stark. “It wasn’t, that’s all you need to remember.” Gently he pushed Thor back so they could both sit up. “Let’s get you up to bed. Your head is going to _hate_ you soon.”

            Thor winced as if now that he’d been reminded of his headache that became his focus. He groaned and Loki watched as all color drained from his brother’s face. Knowing what was coming, he conjured a waste basket and thrust it at him just in time for Thor to throw up.

            Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Stark make a face.

            “Ah man, that’s rank,” commented Stark, waving a hand in front of his face. “I’m cutting you off buddy.” He stood as well and together they helped Thor to his room. Stark left and came back with a glass of water which Thor took. He also jiggled a small bottle, “I don’t know if this is going to help but I didn’t think it would hurt.”

            Loki took the bottle and saw the word “ibuprofen” printed on the front. He read the rest of the label, opened the bottle and took out four of the pills. “They may not do much but it is better than nothing,” he replied, handing the pills to Thor. Once Thor was comfortable he placed a clean trashcan beside the bed. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

            Thor’s eyes shot open and he tried to sit up, wincing in pain at the action. “You’re leaving?”

            “I’m just going into the kitchen,” Loki replied while gently pressing on Thor’s shoulder to get him to lay back down. “I want to see if I can’t find something better to help with your hangover. I promise I shall be back shortly.”

            For a moment it looked as though Thor was going to protest but instead he lay back and used an arm to cover his eyes. “You promise?”

            “I’ll swear it on Mother’s name if you’d like.”

            Thor’s lips twitched. “That’s all right. I’ll believe you.”

            “Try and rest. I’ll be back soon.”

            With that he and Stark left the room. When they were far enough away to be out of earshot Stark turned to him. “What was that?”

            They entered the kitchen and Loki began to rummage around for ingredients to make a hangover tea for Thor. He put the kettle on to heat before replying. “I’m not entirely sure. In our younger days Thor was prone to excessive drinking but never like this. He’s never hallucinated like that before.”

            “And the depression and anxiety?”

            Loki sighed heavily. “That is new. I knew he was feeling melancholy but after their last confrontation with Thanos…” Here he paused biting at his lip. “It’s gotten progressively worse and I have _no_ idea how to help him.” He wiped at his suddenly watery eyes. “I don’t know what to do.”

            “The best thing for him might be to see a therapist.”

            “Would there even be a practice open?”

            Stark shrugged, “People are trying to move on. We really don’t have much choice. The thing about us humans, you knock us down and we’ll get right back up and keep doing what we’ve always done just out of spite. I’m sure someone is open. Actually,” he pulled out his phone and began typing on it, “the woman I saw when I was dealing with my PTSD is still here. I can call and see if I can’t set up an appointment.”

            Loki nodded in agreement just as the kettle began to whistle. At this point, he was willing to try just about anything to help his brother.


	2. First Year - Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor begins therapy and shenanigans ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A couple of quick notes. I've taken creative liberty on Thor and Loki's birth years and their age difference. The equivalent difference I used is the same as between Chris and Tom. I know Thor mentioned in Infinity War that he was 1500 years old. That math doesn't add up AT ALL. During the flashback in Thor the date is 965 A.D. For argument's sake let's say that is the year Loki was born. That would put Thor about 400ish years older than him. So either the Aesir age REALLY slowly or Thor is dumb as a rock not to notice there's a new baby and mom wasn't pregnant. Also part of that flashback shows them as kids and they do seem very close in age so I'm nixing his 1500 year's old. It doesn't make sense.
> 
> I used King Henry IV and Prince Hal for a reason. Tom's love of Shakespeare not withstanding, can anyone guess why?

**First Year – Part Two**

            Thor followed his brother and Stark into the building downtown. The streets were far quieter than he’d expected. Then again, part of him expected for things to have remained the same. It only reminded him of his failure. He saw no reason for them to even be doing this. There was nothing this Midgardian could do to help him. She could not change what had happened.

            They entered the building and took the elevator up to another floor. When the doors opened they found themselves in a nice waiting area. There were a couple people already there and they received a few curious looks. Thor took a seat at the back of the room and watched as his brother and Stark spoke to the receptionist.

            They came to sit on either side of him a few minutes later, Loki had a clipboard with some papers on it. Thor watched his brother read and begin filling out the paper. He began to chuckle lightly as he did so.

            “What are you giggling about?” Stark asked, leaning forward so he could see Loki.

            “Date of birth,” Loki replied. “I’m sure they weren’t expecting a date prior to 1900.”

            Stark’s eyebrows went up. “Huh, I guess I never thought about exactly how old you two are. When _were_ you born?”

            Loki thought for a moment, tapping his pen against his lips. “While the mortal equivalent between us is two years, I was born in 965 and Thor was born in 915.”

            “B.C.?”

            Loki shot in a droll look, “Funny.” He continued to fill out the paperwork as best he could. “What about address and insurance?”

            “Just put my address and don’t worry about the insurance. It’s not like I can’t pay for this.”

            “I cannot ask that of you,” Thor said. He began to stand up only to have an invisible force push him back into his chair.

            “Don’t think you’re getting out of this,” Loki hissed.

            Thor glared at his brother from underneath his hood. “What is the point of this?”

            “We’re trying to help you.”

            “I don’t need help.”

            “Yes, you do, brother. You might not think so but you’ve changed.” Loki turned his gaze back to the paperwork. “You’ve always been so... sunny. Now you’re...” He shook his head, “I don’t know... it’s like this darkness is following you. I feel like I’m chasing you and no matter how fast I run I can’t catch up.”

            Thor hadn’t thought about how recent events had effected his brother. Loki had suffered more than most. He’d nearly been killed by Thanos. If it hadn’t been for Stark’s accidental intervention Loki would still be floating in the void. The thought sent a shiver through Thor.

            “How do you know this will help?”

            “I don’t but even if it doesn’t we can at least say we tried.”

            “I thought the same thing,” Stark said, “when my PTSD was at its worst. I thought, how the hell could talking to a complete stranger help, but it did. Just give it a shot.”

            Thor thought about continuing to argue but knew it wouldn’t be worth the effort. He folded his arms across his chest and slouched in his chair. Loki finished filling out the paperwork and Thor watched him take it back to the receptionist. When he came back, Thor caught his gaze and saw Loki raise an eyebrow at him. “Just _try_ to keep an open mind.”

            Loki returned to his seat and they waited in silence until he was called in. He felt his stomach flip as he stood and he had half a mind to fly out the window. Of course Stormbreaker was still at Stark’s but he could at least jump from the window. They weren’t high enough for any kind of serious injury. Yeah, he could—

            “Stop stalling,” Loki said, poking him in the back of his thigh. At least he hadn’t used a dagger. Thor turned narrowed eyes on his brother. “I’ll still be here when you’ve finished.”

            It hadn’t been until Loki mentioned it that Thor realized he’d feared Loki would disappear on him. He nodded, resigning himself to his fate as he headed into the office. A small plaque that read “Dr. Maria Silva” was on the door. Little flowers were engraved around the name in what looked to be a child’s hand. Thor entered the room, closing the door silently behind him. The room was inviting, with warm colors and he found himself relaxing a bit. Maybe this wouldn’t be as bad as he’d thought.

            Dr. Silva stood from her desk and came around to greet him. She held out her hand, which he shook, being careful not to crush her small hand. Even in her heals she barely came up to his chest. Her hair was the same color as Loki’s but where his skin was like porcelain hers was the color of sand. She held her hair back in a neat braid though a few strands had managed to escape, which she tucked behind an ear.

            “Mr. Odinson, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Dr. Silva but you can call me Maria if you’d like. Most of my patients do.” She gestured to a nearby chair, “Please, have a seat.”

            He did so, lowering his hood as well while she returned to her place at her desk. “I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do,” he admitted.

            She smiled at him. “You don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. I’m here to help you in any way that I can. Whether that’s sitting here in silence for an hour or us having a conversation is up to you. I will tell you that nothing you say here will leave this room except under certain conditions. The main ones being if I feel you plan to do harm to yourself or others.”

            Thor could accept those terms. He started to speak but stopped. What could he talk about? His problems were his own. How could he burden someone else with his woes? He didn’t deserve any help. He deserved to suffer for his failures but he did assure Loki that he would try. “Where do I start?”

            “Wherever you want. Take as much time as you need.”

            He furrowed his brow in confusion, “I thought the appointment was only for an hour.”

            “Today’s appointment, yes,” she said with a smile. “We will have more appointments if that’s what you want. This is a judgement free zone.”

            Something in Thor relaxed at her words. He decided to take her advice and started from the beginning.

* * *

            Time began to fly by after that. Thor continued his sessions with Dr. Silva and Loki noticed a distinct improvement in his brother’s mood. There was still an air of sadness that wasn’t going to go away anytime soon but things were looking up. There had been no word from Lady Danvers in regards to the Asgardian refugees though Loki hadn’t expected as much. Their numbers had been so low before the Snap, he could only imagine what they were now.

            Dwelling on such things would do him no good at the moment. His main focus right now was the mortal fretting before him. Stark paced back and forth muttering to himself. Loki tried to concentrate on his book once more but after the second or third time Stark passed by his seat he gave a frustrated sigh.

            “What is the matter with you?”

            Stark paused, “What… I um… I…” The pacing started again, “I don’t— what’cha reading?”

            Loki barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes at Stark’s antics. “King Henry IV.”

            “Shakespeare?”

            “Yes. I quite like Prince Hal.”

            “Oh, okay.”

            Loki marked his place and set the book in his lap. “Stark, if you don’t stop pacing or say what is bothering you I _will_ stab you.” He manifested a dagger for emphasis.

            “Pepper’s pregnant,” blurted Stark.

            Loki’s eyebrows shot up, dagger vanishing. “Congratulations…? It is yours, isn’t it?”

            “Of course it’s mine.” Stark sat heavily beside him, jostling the sofa. “I just... My god,” he leaned forward, putting his head in his hands. “I have no idea what I’m going to do. I can’t be a dad. I’ll be a _terrible_ dad.”

            Now this was intriguing. “What makes you say that?”

            With a full body sigh, Stark slouched back against the couch. “Howard wasn’t exactly Father of the Year material. I mean, I get now that the guy loved me and all that but growing up I never saw it. All I saw was the cold and calculating Howard who barely even looked at me. Most of the time I felt like he would have been happier if they’d never had me. I don’t want to be _that_ kind of parent but I don’t know anything else.”

            Loki was surprised at Stark’s words. It hadn’t ever occurred to him that parents of every species had their faults. He shifted in his seat until he could face Stark more fully and held out his hand. “Well hello Pot, I’m Kettle.”

            It took Stark a moment to process Loki’s words. “What?” Stark asked with a laugh.

            “I know how you feel. It was like you said, Odin wasn’t going to win Father of the, well, Millennia. I honestly thought he hated me for a while and that I was nothing but a war prize to him but… I know now that he did love me and looking back he did show it. I was just too blind to see it. I was constantly comparing myself to Thor and our father always praised him so when I didn’t receive the same kind of attention I thought he found me lacking.” Loki shrugged. “Turns out he and I were more alike than I knew. Neither of us really knew how to show affection to each other but looking back, I do remember him lavishing attention upon both of us while we were children. At least, when his duties as King allowed for such.”

            Loki returned to his original sitting position and picked his book back up. “Now if you are done having an existential crisis I would like to return to my book.”

            “Fine,” Stark said with a chuckle. Then with a sense of awe he said, “I’m going to be a dad.”

* * *

            Thor found Loki in their shared room later that night. His brother had his nose buried in a book but that was nothing new. Before their lives had changed so drastically nearly eight years ago Loki could always be found with a book. Thor found it comforting that some things never changed.

            Thor stood in the doorway watching his brother for a few minutes. He hadn’t thought Loki knew he was there until he said, “Are you going to come in or continue lurking in the doorway?”

            “I didn’t think you knew I was here,” Thor replied as he moved to sit on the bed.

            “You’re still about as subtle as a bilgesnipe.” Loki looked up from his book. “You seem to be in a better mood.”

            “I am. My sessions with Dr. Silva have helped me more than I’d ever expected. I have to say, I am glad you and Stark forced me to go.”

            “You really did not have any choice in the matter.”

            “What about you?”

            Loki’s brow furrowed. “What about me?”

            “How are you feeling? You been through just as much, if not more, than the rest of us. You...” Thor licked his lips as he thought about how to word what he wanted to say. “You never let anyone see when you are in pain. It wasn’t until you fell from the Bifröst that I’d realized just how blind to your pain I was. We all were really and I... I don’t want you to think you need to suffer anything alone. It is not weakness to need help and I want you to know that I’ll always be there for you.”

            Loki’s gaze returned to his book but Thor could tell he wasn’t reading it. His expression was hard to gauge. Slowly Loki closed his book and set it aside. “I wish I could believe you.”

            Part of Thor wanted to argue. That part of him wanted Loki to see that Thor was reliable and would always be there for him but he knew why Loki had said what he did. It was because when Loki had needed him most, Thor had abandoned him with not so much as a backwards glance. For the longest time Thor had demeaned Loki for not seeming to live up to Thor’s ridiculously high and frankly unattainable measure of what he thought a true man and warrior was.

            “I meant what I said on Sakaar.”

            Loki’s expression closed off and he began to pick at his palm. “It would have been better if we’d never seen each other again.”

            “What?” Thor exclaimed. “No. I only said that because I thought it was what you wanted to hear. I didn’t actually mean it. I meant what I said about thinking the world of you. I never stopped and if you’ll let me, I’d like to be there for you whenever you need it. I know you don’t trust that I’ll keep my word on that but will you let me at least try?”

            Loki pondered Thor’s words for a few moments. Thor began to think he would reject the offer. He would be well within his right to do so.

            “I think I can do that,” Loki finally replied.

            Thor felt a weight lifted from him. He threw an arm across Loki’s shoulders and kissed his temple. “Thank you.”

            “For what?”

            “For giving me a chance to prove myself to you.”

            Loki leaned just the slightest bit more towards Thor. Then suddenly he turned his head and licked Thor’s cheek. Thor recoiled, pushing Loki away and wiping his face, “augh, what was that for?”

            Loki laughed and Thor could tell that for the first time in a long time it was genuine. His laughter reached his eyes. “You were being too somber. I thought we were doing away with all this melancholy. What better way to do that than to annoy my big brother?”

            “It’s disgusting.”

            “That’s never stopped us before. Would you rather a kiss?”

            “No,” Thor couldn’t stop his own laughter. It was refreshing. In retaliation he reached for Loki’s sides.

            Loki saw what Thor planned to do but was too slow to escape. “No!” He cried as Thor’s fingers began to dance along his sides. Loki had ever been ticklish. Laughter echoed throughout the room. Loki tried to squirm away but it was in vain. Thor received an elbow to the stomach and was kicked by his brother but he didn’t stop his assault. Though the elbow near his groin had him rethinking his life choices.

            Loki finally managed to roll off the bed and he jumped to his feet. He must have realized his only means of escape was on the other side of Thor. Breathlessly he said, “That wasn’t fair.”

            Thor stood, making sure to keep himself between Loki and the door. “When have we ever played fair?”

            “Good point,” Loki conceded. “I mean, you do think I’m still in the room.”

            Thor’s eyes widened. There was no way Loki could have escaped so quickly. Loki waved at him with a smile as his form dissolved in a green mist. Thor bolted from the room, fully intent on his recapture. “Get back here!”

            “Do you really take me for a fool, brother?”

            “You really want me to answer that?”

            “Now you’re just being mean.”

            Thor had yet to spot Loki but since he could still hear him he had to be close by. He rounded the corner and nearly ran into Lady Potts. They both jumped, startled by one another. “Sorry.”

            “You’re fine,” she said. “I heard a commotion. What’s going on?”

            Thor grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Loki and I were rough housing.”

            Loki suddenly appeared behind her, looking pathetic. “He was torturing me.”

            Lady Potts raised a skeptical eyebrow glancing back and forth between the two. “Torture?”

            “Loki’s ticklish.”

            From behind her Loki narrowed his eyes to glare at Thor.

            To the surprise of them both she started to laugh. At their identical looks of confusion she said, “I’m sorry. It’s just hard to imagine. God’s are thought to be all powerful. You two humanize divinity.”

            “We’re not technically gods, not by your definition,” Loki said.

            Lady Potts waved away his words. “Either way, you are entertaining.”

            Loki bowed with a flourish. “We aim to please milady.”

            Thor rolled his eyes. “Please forgive my brother and his childish ways.”

            “My childish ways?” Loki sputtered. “I’m sorry, but which of us is the mature one?”

            “I’m the oldest so, me, of course.”

            Loki gave her a look that said _see what I have to deal with?_ “Age and maturity don’t necessarily go hand in hand. If that were the case you wouldn’t need a keeper.”

            “I don’t _have_ a keeper.”

            “Really because as I recall whenever you got yourself into trouble I was the one who had to save your ass.”

            “Would you care for a younger brother?” he asked Lady Potts. “I’m selling, dirt cheap.”

            Loki looked sufficiently offended while Lady Potts laughed again. “Given you’re both older than me I don’t see how that would work. Besides I have my hands full enough as it is with Tony.”

            “Good point,” Loki said. “He is very childlike. Which, speaking of children, I hear congratulations are in order.”

            Lady Potts’s cheeks darkened and she tucked a piece of blond hair behind her ear. “Tony told you?”

            Thor had no idea what they were talking about. He felt like he had just missed something important.

            “He didn’t have much of a choice. He was pacing around and just generally being annoying, completely interrupting my reading. He told me after I threatened to stab him.”

            “You’re stab happy and you call me immature?” Thor asked.

            “Well it worked.”

            Lady Potts sighed. “I’m surrounded by overgrown children.”

            “Think of it as practice. By the time your child is born you will be an expert.”

            That got Thor’s attention. He smiled at the unexpected good news. “You are with child? That’s wonderful!”

            “Thank you.” She seemed embarrassed. “Tony and I panicked at first.”

            “I believe Stark is still panicking.” Loki said dryly.

            “He’s afraid he’ll be a bad father. He also wants us to be married before the baby is born.”

            “When are the nuptials?”

            Now when Lady Potts sighed it was with an air of defeat. “We were supposed to get married two weeks from now but with everything that’s happened we’re not sure if we should even go through with it. It feels like it would be an insult to everyone’s loss if we had the wedding.”

            “It would be admitting defeat and giving Thanos one more victory by _not_ having your wedding.” Loki sounded offended by that. He had a gleam in his eye that Thor had seen before. It usually meant trouble was on the horizon. Loki hooked his arm through hers and began to lead her away. “We must remedy this, post haste.”

            “Loki wait, what are you plotting?” Thor followed after them.

            “Nothing nefarious if that’s what you’re worried about.”

            Okay, not exactly what Thor was worried about but that look was still trouble. “What does ‘nothing nefarious’ entail?”

            “Have you not been paying any attention? The Lady Pepper and Stark require a wedding and I, for one, shall see that it is done properly.”

            “You really don’t have to do that,” Lady Potts said.

            “Maybe not but you and Stark have been kind enough to allow my oaf of a brother and myself into your home. It is the least I can do. Just call me Loki Odinson: Wedding Planner.”

            Thor _really_ did not like where this was going.

            Lady Potts laughed. “I suppose we should tell Tony. I feel like I should ask if you have a reference.”

            Loki waved a hand through the air. “Believe it or not I have actually planned a wedding before.”

            Oh no. Thor had to stop this, like, yesterday. Because if he didn’t shut Loki up he would—

            “Really? Who’s?”

            Too late.

            “Thor’s.”

            “You’re kidding.” They paused and she turned to look back at him. “I didn’t know you were married Thor.”

            “I’m not. Loki jests.”

            “Why do I feel there’s a story here?”

            “Oh because there is.” Loki waved his hand again and Lady Potts suddenly appeared to have a hard time holding in her laughter. “He does look ravishing in that dress, don’t you think?”

            Thor looked down and saw that his clothes had been replaced by a very intricate wedding dress. Another flare of green had the veil forming on his head. He glared through the slit at his brother. _“Loki!”_ Thor made to chase his brother but forgot the skirt and promptly face planted the floor. Loki’s laughter echoed in the hallway.

            When Thor thought things couldn’t get any worse he was proven wrong when he heard Stark ask, “Why is Thor wearing a dress?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed the First Year. I feel Loki may seem out of character but the way I see it, he's comfortable so he's not going to be so uptight. 
> 
> Reviews and kudo's are always welcome. Next chapter sometime next week. Fingers crossed.


	3. Second Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor continues to struggle with his PTSD. Loki helps the best he can and the youngest Stark makes her entrance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now we're cooking with fire. 
> 
> As always, any mistakes are my own and if there are any glaring ones, please let me know. Enjoy.

**Second Year**

            As the months went by Loki and Thor settled into a routine. They were slowly acclimating to life on Midgard but the learning curve wasn’t as bad as they’d thought it would be. There had even been word from Lady Danvers about the refugees. She hadn’t found them yet but there had been rumor of Asgardians in a nearby system. When she was free to do so she was going to investigate.

            In preparation for the baby Tony and Pepper had moved into a cabin up at a nearby lake. They had offered Loki and Thor the home they’d previously resided in which the brothers took. Loki was still unsure how they would ever pay them back. Tony had said the wedding was a nice start.

            Loki was still getting used to calling them Tony and Pepper as opposed to Stark and Lady Pepper. It had been at their insistence that they be called such. “We’re friends for God’s sake, call me Tony,” and so it had begun.

            Thor had been officially diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Thor had seen it as a step back while Loki a step forward. At least now they knew that while it may not be curable it was at least treatable. They had tried medications to help with his symptoms but they did no good as Thor’s metabolism processed them too quickly. Thor went to a support group once every two weeks while his sessions with Dr. Silva were weekly. They did appear to be helping.

            Thor did have his rough patches though. Loki didn’t know what had triggered Thor’s latest bout of depression but he’d been abed for several days. Loki tried to coax Thor from his bed at the very least but to no avail. He had managed to keep him fed and hydrated.

            Loki took a fresh glass of water up to Thor. The midday sun shone in through the curtains and the window had been opened to let in the summer breeze. Loki padded softly over to the bed and sat beside his brother. “Thor,” he called gently, “are you awake?”

            Thor pulled the blankets down to reveal his eyes. “What time is it?” he asked.

            “A little after two,” Loki replied. “Would you like to try for something to eat?”

            Thor seemed to think about it for a moment. Slowly he sat up to lean against the headboard. “I’m not sure.”

            Loki shrugged. “All right. Well the last time I went grocery shopping I made sure to pick up Pop-Tarts for you. They’re in the kitchen if you want them.”

            Thor seemed to perk up at that. Loki could not understand his brother’s obsession with the pastries. They were good in a pinch get but give him a strudel any day.

            “Blueberry?” Thor asked tentatively.

            “Yes, I picked up your blueberry. I also picked up um…” he snapped his fingers as he thought, “S’Mores.”

            A smile lit up Thor’s face. “S’Mores? You bought me S’Mores?”

            Okay so maybe Loki had bought two boxes of that particular flavor and hidden one for himself. Sue him, he may not like Pop-Tarts in general but the S’Mores were good.

            “I think,” Thor’s voice broke into his thoughts, “that I shall partake in the bounty you have procured for me.”

            Loki rolled his eyes. Thor was making jokes so that was a good sign. It was a bad joke but it was better than the lethargy of the past few days. Loki stood and headed for the kitchen. “Do you want that toasted?” He called back.

            “Do you even need to ask?”

            Loki was surprised to find Thor trailing after him. His brother still had his blanket wrapped around his shoulders and his hair was sticking up at weird angles. Loki valiantly managed to refrain from doing a happy dance. Thor was out of bed! Progress was being made.

            Together they went into the kitchen and Loki toasted up a packet of Pop-Tarts for Thor. Afterwards they went into the living area where Loki picked up his controller to continue his game. Thor sat beside him on the couch and nibbled at his food.

            “What are you doing?” Thor asked.

            Loki sat back and watched the screen. “I’m waiting for Dinraal so I can get a fang. Usually it’s Naydra who’s the difficult one.”

            They watched the fire dragon approach the cliff side where Link stood waiting. “You are gathering a dragon’s fang? What for?”

            “Armor upgrade. I’ve almost gotten them all to four stars.”

            Thor looked confused. “When did you start playing video games?”

            “The 1980’s.”

            “What?”

            Loki shrugged. “New York was not the first time in recent years that I’ve been here Thor. I know a lot more about this realm than you do.”

            Thor had no comment for that. Loki manipulated Link to gather the items he needed, doing battle using a glowing broadsword along the way. Out of the corner of his eye, Loki saw his brother becoming engrossed in what he was doing. Eventually Loki received a warning for low battery on the controller and he finally quit playing. He placed the controller on the table and leaned back against the couch. He was pleased to see that Thor had finished off his Pop-Tarts.

            “What was that game?”

            “Zelda.”

            Thor looked confused. “The character’s name is Zelda? Isn’t that a female name?”

            Loki shook his head. “Zelda is the princess, you don’t actually play as her. The Hero of the game is Link, that’s who I’m playing as.” Thor continued to look confused. Loki patted his knee. “I’ll explain the various _Legend of Zelda_ storylines to you later. There are a lot on them.”

            “It looks like fun.”

            “It is. Challenging too. This file is mine but I _may_ let you play when I beat the game.”

            In truth Loki didn’t care if Thor played the game. If it gave him one more reason to get out of bed Thor could play all damn day. Actually... “Once the controller charges we can play a game together.”

            A tiny smile graced Thor’s lips. “Really?”

            “Of course. I shall take great pleasure in kicking your ass at Mario Party.”

            The smile widened into a grin. “You’re on!”

* * *

            Thor sat on the front stoop with his head in his hands. He had just gotten off the phone with Natasha and he couldn’t figure out if he was happy or scared out of his mind. He knew he should be happy but he just couldn’t really muster the emotion.

            News had finally arrived about his missing people. Lady Danvers had found them but it would still take them another three to six months to arrive on Earth. He was supposed to be their king though Thor knew he was just a failure. Loki had mentioned before that their people would need a home once they arrived. He’d been avoiding looking into it because he hadn’t ever expected them to be found. What kind of king gave up on his people?

            _What kind of king gets his people killed?_

Thor massaged his temples with a groan. The voice of his inner demon had returned about a month prior. He’d managed to hide it from Loki, at least his brother hadn’t mentioned any real change in his mood. Thor hoped to keep it that way.

            “What great woes have befallen you now?”

            Thor chuckled. Loki only turned to that elaborate kind of speech when he was being sarcastic. They’d never truly spoken like that in Asgard. Thor lifted his head up, raising an eyebrow at his brother. “I received a call from Lady Romanov.”

            “Oh dear. Do they want you to go on a mission?”

            Some of the surviving Avengers had continued to do what they could to help out around the world. Thor had wanted to help, to do something good, but Loki had put his foot down with a resounding no.

            “Nothing like that,” Thor replied. He sighed, leaning back against the step behind him. “Lady Danvers found our people.”

            Loki’s eyebrows shot up as he took a seat beside Thor. “That’s good news.” He must have sensed something in Thor’s mood because he asked, “Isn’t it?”

            “It is,” Thor conceded.

            “Then what is the problem?”

            Thor didn’t know how to explain his fear to Loki. His people would need money, land, a way to make a living and a leader. He may have been crowned king but if he was being perfectly honest with himself, and he really was of late, he was a _terrible_ king. The remnants of Asgard deserved better.

            “I’m not sure what to do now.”

            “Well,” Loki reclined as well, “what had you planned on originally? I suppose we’ll need to speak with the remaining world governments and see if anyone is generous enough to give us a place to stay. Tony has offered to help financially. It’s going to be a process.”

            One Thor wasn’t sure he was up to. “They’ll need a king.”

            “Yes they will.” Loki tipped his head to the side to look at Thor. “Luckily they already have one. They have you.”

            Thor shook his head. “I cannot be their king.”

            “Why not?”

            “I’m a terrible king.” He turned pleading eyes on his brother. “My first order had been to destroy our home. I failed to fight off Thanos’s attack on us, nearly getting you and everyone else killed. Those that have survived have been drifting among the starts for over a year and I have done _nothing_ to help them. I’ve been here wallowing in my own self-pity. I’m no help to anyone. I’ll only make things worse.”

            “You have an illness.”

            “I’m not sick.”

            “Of the mind, Thor. PTSD isn’t something to take lightly nor is it something that’s just going to miraculously go away. It’s something you’re going to have to work through. You’ve been doing so well.”

            Thor pressed his fingers against his temples again. “I wish I had your control. You never seem to let anything bother you.”

            Loki snorted. “You don’t want to handle emotions the way I do.”

            “Why not?” Thor asked.

            “I ascribe to the ‘Dean Winchester School of Dealing with Feelings’. Minus the drinking. Though he is onto something with the pie.”

            Thor shook his head with a chuckle. “You and that damn TV show.”

            “Oh please, as if you’re one to talk. Three words Thor: Big Bang Theory.”

            Thor defended his choice. “It’s funny!”

            “It’s ridiculous.”

            Thor watched a few children on bikes race each other on the opposite sidewalk. “They are resilient, aren’t they?”

            Loki followed Thor’s gaze. “Children often are.”

            “I meant the Midgardians.”

            “So did I.”

            Thor stood, stretching his aching muscles. How long had he been sitting here?

            Loki stood as well, “Thor, what was it that Dr. Silva said? You can’t help your feelings.”

            “I should be able to. I’m no help to anyone like this.”

            “You help me.”

            Loki had put his hands in his pockets and with his shoulders hunched to Thor he looked very young.

            “You help me just by being here.” Loki said quietly. “I don’t know what I would have done if I’d returned and you weren’t here. I think… I think I would have given up.”

            Thor felt his chest tighten at Loki’s words. Loki had once fallen so low as to try to kill himself. To think that Thor was one of the only reasons he was still here… It was more than he could bear. Thor pulled his brother into his arms. “I promised you I would be here for you and I have no intention of breaking that promise. It is like you said, I cannot help my feelings but what I can do is not allow them to rule me.”

            “You’re trying Thor,” Loki returned the hug. “It’s hard, I know that. Just please, _please_ , don’t give up on yourself.” They pulled apart at the sound of distant thunder. Loki slapped at Thor’s arm. “Enough of this. At this rate you’ll force those children to stop their play. I’m sure this city has seen more rain in the past year than they have in a long time. Sun Thor, sun. We _like_ the sun. The sun is our friend.”

            Thor couldn’t help rolling his eyes at his brother’s words. He slung an arm around Loki’s shoulders. At one time he would have put him in a playful chokehold but ever since Thanos Thor has made sure never to do anything to remind him of his near death experience. Loki had gotten to the point where he appeared to not mind things around his neck but Thor wasn’t going to take any chances. Instead, he poked at Loki’s side. “Happy thoughts, right.”

            “Exactly.”

            As they went inside, the clouds parted and the sun shone once more.

* * *

            As much as Thor had hoped his depression was starting to get better he’d taken a turn for the worse the more he thought about the responsibilities he now had. There was so much now on his shoulders. How was he supposed to rule a nonexistent kingdom?

            _Asgard is not a place but a people._

            Thor was constantly reminding himself of that fact. At first, he’d feared he and Loki were all that remained of their people. What information they’d received on the survivors told them just how devastated they’d been. Outside of Valkyrie and a few gladiators, all that were left were broken families and simple farmers.

            _It’s all your fault. If you had been a better king, Asgard would still be there and her people would have a home. Now they’re adrift with no prospects for the future. All you’ll do is bring them further ruin._

            Thor rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. It was the middle of the night and his mind would not quiet enough for him to sleep. His thoughts circled around one another, always returning to the same dominant thought. He was a failure and there was no way for him to ever make up for it.

            Thor looked at the clock and saw that it was only 1:28 in the morning. He heaved a sigh and crawled from the bed. There was no way he was going back to sleep.

            He left his room, making sure to move quietly so he didn’t wake Loki. He had no real destination in mind and wandered the downstairs for a time. Around 2:00 he dressed and left the house leaving a note for his brother just in case.

            Thor made his way down the road. He came upon a bar a while later. Loki had made sure to keep a minimal amount of alcohol around after the first time Thor had gotten so drunk he’d begun to hallucinate. He knew it was probably a bad idea but the last time it had gotten the voice to stop. One drink wouldn’t hurt, would it?

            Thor’s entered the bar with the single goal of getting everything to _stop._

* * *

            Loki was tired and at a loss. Thor had begun drinking heavily a few weeks ago. The first time he’d seen his brother stumble home drunk off his ass Loki hadn’t known what to do. He’d gotten angry and yelled at his brother. Thor had seemed to shrink at Loki’s berating. Loki had felt awful afterwards but at the time he’d let his anger and fear get the better of him.

            It had gotten to the point where Loki had placed a charm on both the front and back doors to alert him if Thor left the house. Loki wasn’t sure which was worse, Thor drinking at the house or going out to random bars at night to get his fix.

            Loki had done some research on Thor’s condition and found that alcohol abuse wasn’t uncommon. He’d contacted Dr. Silva for advice but there was little Loki could do except make sure Thor’s access was minimal. While it took a _lot_ of alcohol to get sufficiently drunk Loki wasn’t willing to risk his brother’s health.

            Making sure Thor didn’t do anything to hurt himself was a full time job. When he wasn’t trying to drink a liquor store he’d taken to eating just about anything in sight. Loki was constantly wracking his brain for a way to help. He hated that this wasn’t something he could use his seiðr to fix.

            Loki hugged his pillow and buried his head partway underneath it. It was late and all he wanted to do was sleep. Between Thor’s alcoholism and Tony’s freaking out over Pepper’s false contractions, he was _exhausted._

            Loki finally fell asleep and just as he was on the verge of beginning to dream he was awoken by Thor shaking him.

            “Loki,” Thor’s frantic voice broke into his sleep. “Brother wake up.”

            Loki groaned, attempting to hide under his pillow. His voice was muffled when he said, “Go away Thor.”

            “Tony called,” Thor continued, obviously ignoring Loki. “Pepper is in labor.”

            Loki gave a groaning sigh and lifted his head a little. “She’s been having Braxton Hicks contractions for a week.” He rolled so his back was to Thor. “Tell Tony to stop overreacting.”

            “She’s five centimeters dilated.”

            Loki’s eyes shot open and he spun to face Thor. “She’s what?”

            “Five centimeters dilated,” Thor repeated excitedly.

            Loki was wide-awake now. “Why didn’t you say that before?” He threw back the blankets, nearly snacking Thor as he did so. He dressed hurriedly, feeling a strange mix of fear and excitement. As he was tying his boots, he looked up at Thor and his eyebrows shot up. “You are _not_ wearing that, are you?”

            Thor glanced down at his attire, taking in his baggy sweatpants, loose t-shirt and flip-flops. “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

            “You look like you just crawled out of bed.”

            “It’s four thirty in the morning. I _did_ just crawl out of bed.”

            Had Loki really lain awake all night? It didn’t matter, he would sleep later. “At least put some jeans on.”

            He quickly brushed his teeth while Thor changed and ran his fingers through his hair. If he had to he could hide his disheveled appearance behind an illusion. They met up in the entryway and Loki grabbed the car keys. He could have teleported them to the hospital but Loki did not feel like he could do it safely given his exhaustion. Should he be driving? Probably not but driving did not run the risk of getting them stuck between the fabric of reality.

            The trip to the hospital was thankfully uneventful. Loki parked the car far from the entrance, hoping that the walk would help keep him awake. Once inside they followed the signs for the maternity ward and found Tony pacing outside one of the rooms. He didn’t appear to be panicking, instead seeming like he was trying to burn off excess energy. He spotted them as they made their way down the hall.

            “Hey guys,” Tony said. “You didn’t have to come just yet. The doc says it’ll be a few more hours.”

            “We were already awake,” replied Thor, “so we thought we’d come keep you company.”

            “You were already awake,” Loki corrected. To Tony he said, “He woke me up as if Ragnarök had come again.”

            “I did not.”

            “Loki, Loki wake up,” he mimicked.

            Thor grunted, folding his arms across his chest. “It wasn’t like that.”

            Tony chuckled. “Sometimes you two make me glad I’m an only child.”

            Returning to the matter at hand Loki asked, “How is Pepper?”

            “Tired and in pain. We’re waiting for the anesthesiologist so she can get an epidural.”

            “What’s that?” Thor asked.

            “It helps with the pain,” Tony replied. “She’s awake if you want to see her.”

            Tony led them into the room were Pepper was slowly pacing back and forth. She had a hand pressed to the small of her back. Her long hair was loosely tied back but a few of the sweat soaked strands curled around her ears. She smiled when she saw them then winced and pressed against her stomach, inhaling and sharply exhaling through her nose.

            “Contraction?” Tony asked.

            When she opened her eyes, the glare she sent him plainly asked if he was an idiot. She relaxed once it passed and shifted from foot to foot. “Any word on the anesthesiologist?”

            Tony’s expression became apologetic. “They said not for another hour or so.”

            Pepper cringed as another contraction hit her. Loki felt sympathetic. Contrary to popular Norse mythology, Loki had never had children let alone given birth to an eight-legged horse. Their father had actually acquired Slepnir long before either he or Thor had been born. He really had no clue where the idea had even come from.

            “I might be able to help,” he said.

            Pepper looked hopeful. “How?” she asked.

            “I could use my seiðr relieve the pain. It was something our midwives would do.”

            She waved him forward. “If it’ll work then by all means, lay hands.”

            Loki smiled. It appeared she became more sarcastic the further her labor progressed. Loki moved over to her and placed a hand on her stomach. Green shimmered around his hand as he worked his magic. Pepper sighed in relief, her whole body sagging. “Oh thank God.”

            “Just call me Loki.”

            She smacked him in the arm playfully while Thor and Tony groaned. “Cheeky ass,” she said with a smile.

            “Would you expect anything different?”

            “Not at all.” She returned to the bed seeming relaxed for the first time in hours. She pulled the blanket over her legs. “Now if you could just help speed this along, that would be great.”

            Now it was Loki’s turn to look apologetic. “Sorry, there are some things even magic can’t do. However now that you aren’t fighting the pain I think your labor will progress faster.”

            “Thank God,” Tony said as he stood beside the bed.

            “You all keep saying that. My name is Loki.”

            Thor rolled his eyes. “Brother, shut up.”

            Tony stepped back from the bed to give an over exaggerated bow. “The bones in my hand doth praise you milord.”

            Luckily for Tony he was too far from the bed for Pepper to reach him. “Would you like to do this? I’m the one who’s had to suffer the back pain, swollen ankles and this kid using my bladder as a soccer ball. I’m sure there would be a way for Loki to have you feel _all_ of it.”

            Color drained from Tony’s face. “You can’t do that right?” he asked Loki.

            Loki folded his arms and tapped his chin with a finger in thought. “At this stage it would be moot but your next child, let’s just say your scientific community would love to know how a man could become pregnant.”

            Tony blanched while Pepper laughed and Thor pushed at his shoulder. “Don’t scare him like that Loki. The man is terrified enough as it is.”

            Loki shrugged, “take all the fun out of life.”

            There was a knock on the door and they all turned as a tall man entered the room. His gaze took them all in and he didn’t appear to like seeing Thor and Loki in the room. Strange.

            “I’ve come to see how you’re doing Mrs. Stark.” His eyes roved over the brothers for a moment. “I’m afraid this room is family only.”

            Tony’s expression darkened as did Pepper’s. “They are family,” Tony said. “They’re the uncles.”

            Loki felt his chest tighten at Tony’s words. He exchanged a quick glance at his brother to see that he’d been affected as well. It had never occurred to them that they could be considered family by anyone else. He felt his eyes water but luckily no tears fell. They had lost everything and had thought to each be the only family they had left. To know others considered them as such it was heartwarming.

            Loki then remembered the wise words of Bobby Singer, family don’t end in blood. _Damn,_ he thought. Thor was right; he had become _way_ too addicted to _Supernatural._

            The doctor didn’t look convinced but didn’t say anything further. He examined Pepper and while she had dilated to six and a half centimeters, it would still be a while yet before she could begin pushing.

            The next few hours passed uneventfully. There was still joking amongst them and at one point Loki had fallen asleep on the small cot that had been brought in for Tony. It was nearing midday by the time Pepper was ready to give birth.

            The doctor and nurses had made sure everything was ready. Thor held one of Pepper’s hands. Tony held the other while hooking his arm around one of her knees. Loki held the other knee for her. Pepper pushed when she needed and after what seemed to be both a very long and very short period of time Pepper gave one final push and the doctor proclaimed, “It’s a girl,” while putting the baby on Pepper’s chest.

            All four of them burst into tears at the baby’s cry. After Tony cut the umbilical cord, the baby was taken to be cleaned, weighed and measured. Thor and Loki left the room while Pepper was cleaned up. They went back inside a short time later to find Pepper breast feeding the baby. She was practically glowing in her motherhood.

            The grin on Tony’s face was so big it looked like it hurt. He was cooing over the baby completely oblivious to everything else.

            Loki and Thor moved closer to see the child as well. Loki couldn’t help but be awed by what he saw. “She’s so tiny,” Loki said.

            “Have you decided on a name?” Thor asked.

            “Morgan,” Tony replied.

* * *

            Later that night after both Tony and Pepper had fallen asleep and Thor had gone down to the cafeteria to get them something to eat Loki stood over the bassinet looking down at little Morgan. She had fallen asleep shortly after her feeding but now she was awake and watching the witch lights dancing above her. Children never ceased to amaze Loki. He’d never understood how something so small could bring about such fierce feelings of protection. Morgan held no blood relation to him at all, they weren’t even the same species, but Loki knew he would do whatever he had to in order to protect her.

            Morgan blinked lazily up at him and she cooed softly. Her little nose scrunched up just as Thor re-entered the room and she began to fuss. Loki glanced over at his brother before reaching into the bassinet to pick her up. A bottle had been left for Morgan if there came a time Pepper wasn’t able to breast feed her. Loki wasn’t going to wake her so he took the bottle, using his seiðr to warm it just a little and began feeding Morgan.

            “Should I be worried that you know how to do that?” Thor asked quietly.

            Loki raised an eyebrow. “It’s not as hard as you seem to think it is. I’m sure even someone with your limited brain capacity could figure it out.”

            Now Thor rolled his eyes, “Oh hardy har, har.” He put the food down then stood before Loki and both of them watched Morgan feed. Thor reached up and lightly stroked a finger down Morgan’s cheek. “I can’t believe Tony said we were her uncles.”

            “Me either.”

            Tony had awoken sometime during their conversation and came to stand beside them. He held out his arms, “My baby, gimmie, gimmie.”

            Loki raised an eyebrow. “Are you even awake enough to keep from dropping her?”

            Tony’s eyes blinked lazily at them before scrubbing a hand down his face. “You might be onto something.”

            “Besides,” Loki raised her a little to nuzzle against her downy hair, “I have her now. When she needs a diaper change, then I’ll give her back.”

            “Or when her mother says hand her over,” Pepper said from the bed with her arms outstretched.

            Loki pouted but relented, “Fine.” Loki handed Morgan over and Pepper continued to feed her. He leaned against the bed rail. “I have to say I do feel bad for you little one.”

            “Whys that?”

            “Think about it. You are her mother, her father is Iron Man and you have named Thor and myself as her uncles. Poor Morgan is going to end up living life as a spinster. No suiter will ever be good enough for her. Anyone she brings around will end up running away screaming.”

            “Oh my god, now there’s a thought,” Pepper said.

            “Geeze, I can picture it,” Tony said with a laugh. “I’m polishing my armor, Thor’s standing there with Stormbreaker and Loki’ll be tossing a knife back and forth, full armor and all.”

            “It won’t just our armor and weapons,” Thor raised his hands and lightning danced around his fingers, his eyes glowing white momentarily.

            Tony rubbed Morgan’s head. “I’m sorry baby, no love life for you.”

            “She’s only a few hours old,” Pepper laughed. “Why are we talking about a love life that doesn’t even exist and won’t until she’s at least thirty.”

            “Good point,” Loki danced witch lights around Morgan, who watched the green orbs move around. “It’s nothing to worry over.” He reached down and bopped her nose. “What they really need to worry about is the amount of mischief we are going to get into.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have this headcanon that Loki knows more about Earth than Thor because he's been here a lot more. Also headcanon, Loki likes Supernatural and yes, he is playing Breath of the Wild.


	4. Third Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki babysit Morgan. The Asgardian refugees finally arrive and Loki petitions the United Nations for a place to live. Loki is forced to face a part of his past he would rather leave buried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter. It's clocked in at just under 9K words. This is the chapter I've wanted to get to but it has also been the hardest to build the way I wanted it. I don't touch on Loki's torture to the in-depth I would like but let's face it, that would be a whole story on it's own. A future one-shot perhaps?
> 
> I needed an asshole character and I feel like using Ross is cliché but it is what it is. 
> 
> I know I tagged it but as another warning Loki does suffer a flashback and relives some of his torture. Just wanted to forewarn anyone just in case it's a trigger for them.
> 
> Also, Tony drops the F-bomb a couple of times. 
> 
> Reminder, all mistakes are my own. Any glaring ones please let me know.
> 
> Enjoy

**Third Year**

            Loki was being hunted by the most fearsome creature in all the Nine Realms. He scurried around the nearest corner, listening for it. Looking around he found the coast to be clear. He moved further down the hallway as silently as he could. He’d miscalculated though because as he rounded the next corner the creature found him.

            “Oh no!” Loki cried out dramatically as Thor placed Morgan in his arms and Loki fell to the floor (slowly) to lay on his back. “The slobber monster has found me.”

            Morgan squealed in delight as Thor mock roared and gently maneuvered her spit-covered hands to smack Loki in the face. Her little legs bounced in her excitement. “Fear me,” Thor said in a baby voice pretending it was Morgan speaking.

            One of Morgan’s hands latched onto Loki’s lip and he tipped his head back to free himself. “No, I’m doomed.” Thor shimmied her up until her little stomach was covering Loki’s face. That was a bad idea because as soon as he did that she grabbed his hair. This time Loki cried out for real. “No, no let go.”

            Thor laughed as he gently lifted her and carefully removed Loki’s hair from her fingers. “No little one. No pulling Uncle Loki’s hair.”

            Loki sat up, rubbing at his face and watched as she began to pull at Thor’s beard. Thor tried in vain to keep her questing hands away from his hair. She gripped his face, her little fingers digging into his chin.

            “Ah,” Thor pulled her hands away as gently as he could. “Why do babies have nails like knives?”

            Loki shrugged then stood up. “What are you complaining about? I stab you all the time.”

            “That’s different,” Thor said. “I also think you may have a problem.”

            “Of course I have a problem. I have many problems. The first of which is that you have Morgan and I do not.”

            Thor rolled his eyes. “Well too bad she’s— ow!” Morgan laughed as she pulled at Thor’s hair. It had grown out much in the past few years but it wasn’t quite at the length it had been. It was, however, long enough for Morgan to capture in her little fingers.

            Loki decided to take pity on his brother and carefully extracted his hair from Morgan’s grasp. He brought about some witch lights, which she tried to reach for instead. He manipulated one of the orbs to land on her nose. Her eyes crossed but she gurgled happily.

            “Thank you,” Thor said, tossing his hair over his shoulder. He bounced her a little as she chased the orbs. “Have you heard anything from Tony or Pepper yet?”

            Loki tickled Morgan’s feet as he replied, “Tony keeps sending me texts saying he’s dying and requesting a rescue.”

            “It’s a fund raiser. How bad could it be?”

            Loki raised an eyebrow. “You remember the parties where father hosted the nobility?”

            “Yes.”

            “While not quite on the same scale, think of the fundraiser as being like that.”

            Thor grimaced, “I take it back. That is terrible. Maybe we should rescue him.”

            Loki took Morgan from his brother and together they all went back out to the living room where Loki placed Morgan under her mobile. He made sure to keep a few witch lights around for her to watch.

            “Unfortunately we can’t.” He sighed as he sat on the couch. “Not unless you wish to endure Pepper’s wrath.”

            Thor raised his hands defensively, “Tony’s on his own.”

            Loki smirked, “That’s what I thought.”

            Thor sat beside him and together they watched Morgan play with her toys. The rest of the night was relatively uneventful. After feeding and bathing Morgan, Loki rocked her until she fell asleep. Thor would have done it but he lost the coin toss. Thor swears Loki cheated. Loki refused to either confirm or deny doing so.

            During an intense game of Mario Kart the baby monitor went off, Morgan’s cries coming through the speaker. They paused their game to check on her. The smell hit them first and Loki pushed Thor in front of him. “Your turn for diaper duty.”

            Thor managed to reach back and grab Loki’s shirt before he could escape. Loki made a sound like he was being dragged to the gallows. Thor turned the light on, pulling Loki behind him. They neared the crib and for a moment stared at Morgan. She had become red faced and tears were running down her cheeks. Her shrill cries couldn’t distract them from what they saw. “I-is it behind her head?” Loki asked incredulously as he peered over Thor’s shoulder.

            “Pick her up,” Thor said.

            Loki’s eyes bulged. “Are you joking? I’m not touching that. That’s disgusting. _You_ pick her up.”

            Thor’s lips peeled back in a grimace as he slowly reached for Morgan. He held her out at arm’s length as they moved from the crib to the changing table. Loki looked back at the crib. “It’s on the sheets!”

            “Get the wipes.”

            “That’s not going to work Thor. She needs a bath.”

            “She had one earlier.”

            “Wipes aren’t going to be enough,” Loki repeated. “I mean, it’s gone up her back and into her hair!”

            Thor gagged as he removed Morgan’s onesie then her diaper. He threw both into the trashcan beside the table. “It’s on my fingers,” he cried.

            “Bath!” Loki yelled, running from the room to prepare the bath. Thor brought Morgan a minute later. Her cries started to lessen once she was in the water.

            “You wash her,” Thor said. “I have to go burn the skin off my hands.”

            Loki gently washed Morgan. “We’ll need to burn your bedclothes too I’m afraid. There is no salvaging them. I don’t know what your parents have been feeding you but they need to stop.” Morgan began to yawn by the time Loki finished cleaning her up. He wrapped her in a fluffy towel then took her back to her room for a fresh diaper and onesie.

            Thor rejoined them once he’d sufficiently scrubbed his hands. He looked at the crib like it was about to attack him. “What do we do about the sheets?” he asked.

            “Burn them.”

            Though he couldn’t see it Loki could sense Thor’s eyebrow go up. “I don’t think Pepper and Tony will appreciate that.”

            “Too bad,” Loki replied.

            Thor stripped the crib and remade it with fresh sheets. When Loki tried to put Morgan back in her crib she began to fuss again. She only calmed when she was being held. He shared a look with his brother and Thor just chuckled. “I can take her off your hands if you’d like,” he offered.

            Loki gave him a look as if he’d just said something stupid, which to be fair he had. “Not on your life.” They returned to the living room where Loki reclined on the couch and laid Morgan on his chest. She gurgled happily, her head lying just under his chin and putting her tiny fist in her mouth. Loki frowned down at her a little. “Why do I have the feeling you did all that on purpose?”

            “She’s only a few months old,” Thor said, taking a seat on the opposite couch. “How manipulative could she be?”

            Loki gave Thor a skeptical look. “She’s smart enough to already have everyone wrapped around her little finger. I mean,” he gestured at himself, “I’m being used as a pillow.”

            “I’m hearing complaining. I suppose I could suffer taking her off your hands.”

            Loki curled around Morgan a little. “I gotz the baby.”

            Thor rolled his eyes. “I see that and I will take her back at some point.”

            “We’ll see.” He rubbed Morgan’s back. “You want to stay with me, don’t you baby?” he asked her. “Because you love me more than stinky ol’ Thor.”

            Thor threw a pillow at Loki’s head and Loki laughed as he deflected it. The phone began to ring and Thor moved to answer it. Loki shimmied on the couch until he was comfortable, being careful not to jostle Morgan who had already fallen asleep on his chest. Thor came back a few minutes later and his expression prompted Loki to ask, “What’s wrong?”

            Thor blinked at him almost as if he were in a daze. “That was Natasha. The refugees will be landing near the facility in an hour or so. She wants me to be there when they land.”

            Loki watched Thor as he sat heavily on the opposite couch. He had a bad feeling Thor would experience an anxiety attack soon. Slowly sitting up so as not to wake Morgan, Loki asked, “Are you alright?”

            Thor began picking at his fingernails and one of his legs started to bounce. “I’m not sure,” he replied softly.

            “Do you want me to come with you? Actually, I probably should since, you know, prince and all.”

            Thor bit his lip then got up and started to pace. “Tony and Pepper won’t be back for some time. Their fundraiser is supposed to last well past midnight and we can’t leave Morgan here alone.”

            Loki stood, again careful not to wake the baby, and stepped into Thor’s path. “Then we call them and let them know what is going on. I’m sure they will be more than understanding.”

            Thor shook his head, “We promised we’d watch Morgan for them tonight. We can’t— we can’t interrupt their event.”

            “Okay, then you stay and watch Morgan and I’ll meet our people.”

            Thor took a shaky breath and Loki could see tears beginning to form in his brother’s eyes. “I-I’m their king. I s-sh-should be there.”

            “Thor looked at me.” When he had his brother’s gaze Loki said, “Take a breath. I’ll call Tony and tell him what’s going on. You pack Morgan’s diaper bag. We’ll take her with us and I’ll tell our people she’s your love child.”

            Thor snorted. He took a deep breath and scrubbed his hands down his face. Loki could see that he was trying to keep his anxiety from overwhelming him. It was a battle Loki wasn’t sure Thor would win but at least he was trying.

            Thor nodded, “Diaper bag and you call Tony. Okay I... we...” He took another breath. With a shaky voice he said, “I hate this.”

            Loki squeezed Thor’s arm. “I know you do. I hate seeing you suffer from this. If I could I would take it away from you but I can’t.” He gestured to the baby still in his arms. “Do you want to cuddle Morgan while I call Tony?”

            Thor wiped his eyes and shook his head. “No I’ll... I’ll go pack her bag.”

            Loki nodded. “All right. I’ll call him and Thor,” he made sure his brother met his eyes once more, “everything will turn out fine. It may take time but it will. I promise.”

            Thor nodded then went to pack the bag. Loki called Tony and told him what was going on. Tony said that he and Pepper would meet them at the Avengers facility as soon as they could.

            Morgan woke briefly when Loki was putting her in her car seat but she fell back asleep quickly. Thor was a nervous wreck the whole ride to the facility. Dark clouds covered the sky and thunder rumbled in the distance.

            The ride was silent and Thor looked like he wanted nothing more than to bolt. Loki fervently wished he knew how to help his brother. He felt powerless and he hated that feeling.

            When they finally arrived, there were many people milling about. It looked like the refugees had already landed. Loki could see the haggard Asgardians and glanced to Thor out of the corner of his eye. He parked the car then reached over and squeezed his knee.

            “You see Thor, you’re not alone.”

            Thor turned to him, a look of confusion on his face. “I haven’t been alone since you came back.”

            Loki gestured to the people outside. “I meant you’re not the only Asgardian left.”

            Thor still looked confused. “I already knew that. You’re here.”

            Loki took the keys from the ignition with a sigh. “You know I’m not Asgardian Thor.”

            “Yes you are.”

            Brow furrowed, Loki looked at Thor. “But I’m…” he still had a hard time saying Jötunn.

            “You may not have been born _Æsir_ but that doesn’t make you any less Asgardian.”

            “It kind of does.”

            Thor tipped his head back against the headrest. “Loki as smart as you are sometimes you can be completely dense. Asgardian isn’t a species you idiot, it’s a culture.” He looked back over at Loki with a small smile. “Trust me, you’re Asgardian. Though you are taking to Midgard quite well.”

            Loki smacked Thor in the chest, causing the other man to flinch but it also earned Loki a small chuckle. Loki chuckled softly as well before exiting the vehicle. Thor got out while he was getting Morgan from the backseat and together they headed for the large group of people. Honestly, there were more survivors than Loki had been expecting.

            As soon as the first refugees spotted Thor, a collective shout of happiness began to ring out from the group. Looks of despair changed to that of hope.

            Beside him, Thor froze. Loki nudged him with his shoulder. “Still here,” he said softly.

            Thor grasped his wrist and squeezed it. He let go just as Valkyrie made her way towards them. “Thor, Lackey, thank the Norns you’re alive.”

            Loki felt his eyebrow twitch. “Don’t call me that.”

            Morgan took that moment to make herself known. Loki set her carrier down and pulled her from it. “I know little one. The mean old Valkyrie was making fun of me.” For a second it looked like she was going to take a swing at him. “Ah, I have a baby.”

            Valkyrie blinked at him. “Wait. _Why_ do you have a baby?”

            “She’s Thor’s love child.”

            “Loki.” Thor sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “She’s our friend’s daughter,” he explained. “We were watching her for them when we received word or your arrival. Loki thinks he’s funny.”

            “I’m adorable,” Loki said. He rocked Morgan to calm her. Becoming serious he asked, “How many survived?”

            Now it was the Valkyrie who sighed. “Including the gladiators, all told, about a thousand.”

            That number was less than what Loki wanted to hear but it was more than he’d expected. Their numbers were small, yes, but they were enough to allow them to rebuild. They had already gotten through the hard part, they’d survived. The rest would be easy.

            _Now all we need is a place to live_ , Loki thought.

* * *

_Why did I volunteer to do this again?_

            Loki stood outside the large room that held what was left of the United Nations. It had been a little over two weeks since the Asgardian refugees had landed on Earth and Loki had been working hard to find them all a place to live. Tony had come with him and had offered to support them financially until New Asgard (as their new home would be called) was able to support itself. Both Loki and Thor had told the man countless times, he didn’t have to do that but Tony insisted. Once Pepper had told them to shut up and accept it, they’d stopped arguing the matter.

            This would be the forth (or was it fifth) day of meetings. Loki felt like he’d been talking in circles the whole time. Today appeared to be more of the same. He wished his brother was with him but Thor had remained behind to reconnect with their people and to work with Valkyrie to do a census.

            Loki had donned his royal leathers for the occasion. The light glinted off the horns on his helm. He’d thought about not wearing his helm so as to not appear too intimidating. The last thing he needed to do was cause the Midgardians to decide the Asgardians needed to leave the planet. However, it _was_ part of his royal attire so he’d kept it. It made Tony really happy for some reason.

            He was finally informed that the leaders had convened and he could once more enter the assembly room. Loki mentally steeled himself for another day of battling with words.

            He walked up to the podium, looking out at a room nearly half empty. Many of the world’s governments had had to quickly elect new leaders or completely change how their country was governed. Others had completely collapsed. There was so much more to Thanos’s devastation than just the loss of life.

            Loki waited for the murmurs to die down before he began to speak. “Leaders of Midgard, I thank you for allowing me to return.”

            “Explain to me again why we shouldn’t lock you away?”

            Loki turned his gaze to the Secretary of State for the U.S.: Thaddeus Ross. Tony had spoken of the man. Nothing he’d said had been nice. The whole time Loki had been petitioning for a place for the Asgardian’s to stay, Ross had constantly fought back against it.

            “I am a Prince of Asgard—”

            “Which mean’s nothing.”

            “—and since you recognize my brother, Thor, as the sovereign ruler of our people with diplomatic ties to your countries, I have diplomatic immunity as a representative of Asgard.”

            Ross leaned forward in his chair. “Who’s to say you haven’t brainwashed Thor? Where is he by the way? Why isn’t he here petitioning for his people instead of you?”

            In his mind, Loki envisioned stabbing the man, repeatedly. “Asgard was destroyed shortly before Thanos came to Earth.” He’d explained this several times. “Our people were decimated. He is working with the Avengers to learn how many of our people survived.”

            “Thor must not be a very competent ruler to send a psychopath to negotiate with us.”

            Loki bit his tongue. To lash out now would do him no good. Loki also refused to take the bait. “We estimate roughly a thousand of our people have survived. We ask if any of your respected countries would grant us sanctuary within your boarders.”

            “Why should we allow you to stay? I mean _you_ specifically. You tried to conquer Earth less than a decade ago. What assurances do we have that you won’t try again?”

            “I have been here for three years already. While I make no excuses for my actions against your realm it was never my desire to rule you.”

            “So you just wanted unmitigated destruction?”

            Looking out at the delegates Loki could see that some agreed with Ross’s questioning. Others appeared annoyed at having the same questions asked over and over, even if the wording was different.

            “No,” Loki replied with a slight shake of his head.

            Ross looked down at something in front of him and began to flip through some papers. “According to reports, you allied yourself with Thanos in order to take over Earth. The Tesseract was your payment to him for the use of his army. Do you deny this?”

            “No,” Loki said, “however the circumstances behind it are not what you think they were.”

            Ross’s expression turned to one of skepticism. “Are you trying to say you’re not at fault?”

            “I have already said that I make no excuses for my actions. What you need to understand is that those actions were not of my own free will. When Thanos wants something from someone, he will obtain it one way or another. He would have come to Earth for the Stones regardless of whether or not he sent me. If it _had_ been Thanos who attacked in 2012 your world would have suffered more damage than what I caused. He would have destroyed your world then and there would have been _nothing_ you could have done to prevent it.

            “I made sure I would be defeated so as to give your world a chance. I never truly tried to conquer your realm. Trust me General; if I had actually wanted to take over your world I would have done so.”

            Ross continued to glare at him. Loki began to wonder if the man had any other expression. From what he had seen so far, it didn’t appear so.

            “So what you’re saying is that we should be grateful to you?”

            “Not at all. What I am saying is things would have been worse. I tried to keep the casualties to a minimum.”

            “New York City would disagree with you.”

            “Whatever you think of what I’ve done I ask that you don’t take it out on our people. Asgardians have a rich culture. I believe our peoples could learn from each other to everyone’s mutual benefit.”

            Mona Juul, the delegate from Norway spoke, “Norway would gladly house the Asgardians. Given our mutual past it would be nice to learn more about our cultural origins.”

            “I’ve read up on Norse mythology,” Ross said to her. “You want _that,_ ” he gestured to Loki, “in your country? Loki brings nothing but trouble.”

            “If you actually believe what is in those mythos then you are a bigger fool than I thought,” Loki said.

            Ross returned his glare to Loki. “You’re claiming you were being controlled by Thanos when you first came here. You are known as the God of Lies. How can we believe anything you say? What proof do you have to support your claim?”

            Beneath the podium, Loki clenched his fists. He hated that moniker. It was misleading. He could detect a lie easier than most. That’s not to say that Loki couldn’t weave a good lie but, contrary to popular belief, he actually told the truth more often than not. The problem was most people never wanted to hear the truth when it shows them in a negative light so they call those truths lies to make themselves feel better.

            To make matters worse, he didn’t have any proof of his claims other than his memories. Things he did everything he could not to remember.

            “All I have is my word.”

            “Not good enough. We have no assurances that you have no designs to try again. You were an _ally_ of Thanos,” Loki didn’t like the way the man had emphasized ‘ally.’ “I see no reason to believe you are not still working for him.” He looked back to the paperwork before him. “You did end up giving him the Tesseract, isn’t that correct?”

            “I did.”

            “Because you are still working with him.”

            “Thanos is dead.” Loki said sharply. “I gave him the Tesseract to save my brother’s life.”

            “Again, we have only your word of that. What is your reward for aiding him?”

            “My reward?” Loki’s lips pressed into a thin line. “My _reward_ as you call it, was death. Thanos lifted me by the neck and squeezed until it broke.”

            “And yet,” Ross spread his hands wide, “here you are.”

            “Because I found him.”

            Loki turned to look at Tony, who was openly glaring at Ross.

            “You have no idea what Thanos was like. The only reason I survived my encounter with Thanos was because I got lucky. I saw the wreckage of the Asgardian’s ship he left behind. Thanos brought nothing but death and honestly, the only reason I picked Loki up originally was so Thor would be able to give him a proper funeral. I thank god I accidently saved his life.

            “If you would get your head out of your ass you’d realize that Loki and all the other Asgardians are an asset to Earth. People change Ross, _I_ changed and if it means anything, I vouch for Loki. He and Thor are two of the best friends I have and I wouldn’t change that for anything.”

            Ross didn’t look impressed at all. In fact, he somehow looked angrier than before. “I thought you were smarter than that Stark. I hadn’t realized how easily fooled you are.”

            “Have you actually read the reports?”

            “I have,” Ross conceded. “Which is why I have asked for further testimony.”

            The doors opened again and Nebula stepped into the room. Shocked and angry, Loki moved around the podium. “You would take the word of a _Daughter of Thanos_?” Even after all this time, Loki would love nothing more than to plant one of his daggers in her head. She was nothing but a reminder of things he would sooner forget.

            Condescendingly Ross said, “She has done nothing against Earth.”

            “You’re joking?” Tony asked incredulously. “Don’t get me wrong, I like Blue Meanie but you’ll accept that she doesn’t plan anything against Earth as say, revenge for us killing her dad?” To Nebula he said, “I know you’re not but I’m trying to make a point.” Once again speaking to Ross, “You’ll condemn Loki for something he had no control over.”

            “You say all of this Stark but again, where is the proof?” He pointed to Loki, “If I allow you to stay I want you locked in a maximum security facility until the day you die.”

            “That’s not going to happen,” Tony growled.

            “You wish for proof?” Nebula asked.

            Ross raised an eyebrow. “You have some?”

            “My father sent Loki to Terra for the Tesseract however the easy agreement you seem to think they had was not the case. Loki defied my father at first. He has the ability to walk between worlds, an ability my father wanted to utilize as for many years he had been banished to the far reaches of the universe. He also had information my father wanted. My father had my sister and I, along with others, torture him until he complied.”

            Ross shook his head as if he couldn’t believe what he had just heard. “Interesting story and too convenient to be true.”

            Again Nebula asked, “You wish for proof?”

            Suddenly the sound of Loki’s own screams filled his ears. He stood frozen in place as Nebula projected one of his torture sessions to the assembly.

            _The world around him faded out and he was once more within his blood-covered cell. He no longer knew how much of the blood that covered the walls and floor was his. He was sure every inch had been covered by now._

_The hooks running through his wrists and ankles pulled painfully as he tried to get away from Gamora running the knife down his back. He still heard the wet sound of skin hitting the ground over his screams. Both women were trying to outdo each other to gain their father’s favor. So far, Gamora was winning._

_Gamora came to stand before his hanging form. “Your father stole the Tesseract from my father. Tell me where it is.”_

_Loki spat at her. His red blood stood out starkly against her green skin. “You, your father and everyone else here can all rot in Hel.”_

_Nebula angrily swiped a knife from the table and thrust it into his side. “Answer her question!”_

_Loki cried out, his dwindling energy causing his cry to turn into a whimper. He smiled defiantly as he looked up at Nebula from beneath hooded eyes. “Come now Nebula, you’ll have to do better than that.”_

_Nebula reared back as if to hit him but Gamora caught her hand. “No sister,” she motioned to something out of Loki’s sight. “Our session is finished.”_

_The two women moved back from Loki as the hooded form of the Other entered his vision. The creature carried a scepter with a glowing blue gem. Loki whimpered again knowing the creature planned on using it on him once more. “Your memories have been obscured,” the creature rasped. “We need to try harder if we are to clear them.”_

_The gem glowed as the Other placed the tip of the scepter to Loki’s forehead. White-hot pain raced through his body. He tried to fight the assault into his mind but in his weakened state, it was all too easy for the Other to invade._

_Memories surged before him. His last encounter on the Bifröst, Thor holding him by the neck over the abyss. “You are no brother of mine,” growled Thor. Loki tried to speak. He tried to plead with his brother to pull him back. He clawed at Thor’s arm in vain. “You are nothing but a monster.”_

_He looked to his father for help only to find Odin turning away from him. With hate-filled eyes, Thor threw him over the edge…_

_But no, that wasn’t what had happened at all. Thor hadn’t thrown him from the Bifröst. Loki had let go. He screamed until his throat bled, trying to force the Other from his mind. With what little reserves of energy he had left, he lashed out with his seiðr._

_The Other staggered back, the connection between their minds broken for the moment. Loki’s chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath. The Other growled, gripping Loki’s hair and wrenching his head up. “You will break little prince. Everyone does.”_

* * *

            Tony had felt his blood turn to ice the second Nebula began to project what looked like a memory. Loki’s screams had echoed throughout the chamber. He watched in horror as Loki was tortured and was pretty sure he was going to throw up.

            Tony looked over to Loki only to see him frozen in place, eyes wide as he watched the projection. Tony moved over to him and saw that his pupils had blown wide. It didn’t look like he was actually seeing what was in front of him.

            A look of horror and pain crossed Loki’s face right before he let out a blood-curdling scream and fell back against the podium. Tony knelt down beside him. “Loki?”

            Loki shook his head, his eyes not focused on anything. He flinched away when Tony tried to reach for him and screamed again.

            Tony reared back as if struck. He could hear the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. “Shut that off!” he yelled at Nebula. The projection and sound vanished. It did nothing to snap Loki out of his flashback, which is exactly what Tony figured his friend was having.

            He turned back to Loki. “Can you hear me Loki? It’s Tony.” Loki had curled into a ball, his hands pressed against his head. The green of his irises was almost completely overshadowed by his pupils. He was shaking and muttering to himself in a language Tony was only able to pick out pieces of. Tears streamed down Loki’s cheeks and Tony’s heart broke when he begged for his brother.

            Son of a bitch. Tony pulled out his phone and dialed Thor. It rang longer than Tony would have liked. “Pick up damn it.” It went to voicemail and Tony cursed again. Catching movement out of the corner of his eye Tony saw Nebula and many of the delegates coming closer. He swiped an arm out at them. “Out!” he shouted. “Everyone get the hell out of here!”

            Many listened to him but Ross came closer anyway. The man looked bored. “A bit over the top, don’t you think?”

            Tony’s jaw dropped. “You think he’s faking this?”

            “Of course he is.”

            Tony dialed Thor again. “Fuck you Ross.” He put the phone to his ear while wishing he knew what to do for his friend. Loki was white as a sheet and shaking violently. Thor finally answered and Tony didn’t let him get past, “hello.”

            “Thor listen, somethings happened. I need you to drop whatever you’re doing and get here ASAP. You need to try and get through to Loki. He’s having a flashback and I can’t snap him out of it.”

            _“What?”_

            “I’ll switch to video.” Tony set to a video call and pointed the phone at Loki. “You can try and talk to him but honestly Thor, I don’t know if that’ll be enough. I really think you need to get here, now.”

            _“Loki,”_ Thor’s voice seemed so low coming through the phone. _“Brother can you hear me?”_

            Loki continued to shake and mutter to himself. He didn’t appear to hear Thor either.

            “Loki… Here hold on.” Tony put the phone down. “Loki, I’m going to take your helmet off okay.” Very carefully reached over to remove Loki’s helm. Tony began to worry he was going to either make himself sick or pass out due to how fast his breaths were coming. Once he set the helm aside, he picked the phone up again and put it to Loki’s ear. “Talk.”

            Tony couldn’t hear what Thor was saying to his brother but nothing seemed to be working. Loki suddenly wrenched himself away with another blood-curdling scream and a shockwave of green radiated out from the trickster, sending everyone nearby to the ground.

* * *

            _Loki had no idea how he’d managed to stay awake. He wanted nothing more than for the darkness of unconsciousness to take him. Even death would be a welcome reprieve from this torture. He could feel warm blood running down his side from where his right arm_ had _been. The pain of the hook pulling on his left wrist was overshadowed by the loss. His missing tongue and left eye throbbed in sympathy to his missing limb._

_“It is rather remarkable,” Ebony Maw observed to Thanos. “I had heard rumors that those with powerful magic such as he carries could regenerate limbs but I have never seen an actual case.”_

_Thanos watched impassively. He stood before Loki and gently lifted his head. “I can stop your pain son. All you have to do is accept the truth and tell me where to find the Tesseract.”_

_Loki whimpered. With his tongue missing, he couldn’t speak even if he’d wanted to. Tears streaked his blood stained cheeks._

_“I’m afraid you will have to wait until his tongue grows back milord,” Maw said. He stood beside Thanos and used his telekinesis to force Loki’s jaw open. “As you can see, it has already begun to regrow, as has the eye. To be perfectly honest sire, I do not believe he can die.”_

_A small smile graced Thanos’s lips. “Interesting. Have there been any adverse effects from the Mind Stone?”_

_“None at all, though while he has resisted us so far I do believe your new son will join us soon.” Maw laughed, “He still clings to the belief that he has not been abandoned.”_

_Thanos let out a nose of disgust. “You mean nothing to them.” Thanos stepped back and gestured to the room around them. “If your so-called family truly cared for you would they have given you to me? Would they let you suffer like this?”_

_Loki let his head drop. Truthfully, he had asked himself the same thing. His hope was dwindling with every passing moment. He couldn’t give in. He couldn’t be weak._

_“You want a throne of your own. You had one and Odin took it away from you. Thor threw you away as if you were nothing. I know the truth. I know you are powerful and will make a great king. It_ is _what you want.” Loki flinched back with a whimper as Thanos gently rubbed his head. “You have a glorious purpose before you. I will give you your freedom and a throne. All you must do is give me the Tesseract. Think on it.”_

_Thanos moved away and the chains holding Loki went slack. He dropped hard to the ground as both Thanos and Maw left the cell. Loki dragged himself to one corner of the cell, the chains pulled along behind him. Loki lay on his side reaching up with his good arm to the stub that was left of his right arm. He prodded it with shaky fingers before pulling his hand away and curling in on himself._

_Loki let himself cry. He’d dropped the spell keeping him from Heimdall’s sight long ago. Why had no one come for him? Loki took his blood-covered fingers and ran them along the stone walls._

_The wall shimmered but with one missing eye and shaking fingers, Loki couldn’t tell if the rune was right. Not that it would have mattered really. He held no blood relation to them… It would explain why they hadn’t come. He was a monster, why would they come for him? Why would they care?_

_“Mama… Papa… Thor…” He whispered with his newly reformed tongue. “I’m here. Please. Please I’m here. I’m sorry, I want to come home._ Please, _why won’t you come? I’ll be good, I promise. I just want to go home. Please, please, let me come home.”_

* * *

            Thunder boomed overhead as Tony pulled himself from the floor. Luckily, he hadn’t had much of a fall since he’d already been kneeling beside Loki. Tony looked around at what had once been the assembly hall. Chairs had been overturned, the mahogany podium and the surrounding furniture was broken and strewn about. It almost looked like a bomb had gone off. Ross had been knocked ass over teakettle, which Tony found satisfaction in.

            Tony’s foot knocked into his broken phone. He kicked it aside and looked around for Loki. He found him where he’d been before except the shaking had stopped. Loki’s wide glazed eyes stared out at nothing. Tony feared he’d gone catatonic.

            The doors to the assembly opened again and Tony turned to see Thor enter in all his godly glory. Thor’s gaze frantically searched the room and once he’d spotted his brother he dropped Stormbreaker and ran over to him.

            “Loki,” Thor called gently. He gripped Loki hands and carefully moved them from his face. “I’m here brother. Whatever you’re seeing, it’s not real.”

            Loki shook his head, his lips trembling. He said something in that other language and Thor jerked as if he’d been slapped. He replied in the same language, his voice pleading. Tony was still only able to pick out a few words. Those that he could broke his heart.

            He heard movement. Tony stood and caught Ross before the man could get near the brothers. “Leave them alone.”

            “He can stop the act,” Ross said. “We all know he’s only playing for sympathy. I’m not going to allow him to continue this charade.”

            “You saw the same clip I did. You heard his screams and that was only a sliver of what Thanos did to him. You think you could have survived that? You think you wouldn’t have broke? God dammit Ross, _I_ would have attacked New York if I’d been in his shoes.”

            “He was his ally—”

            “He was his _victim._ ”

            “Unlikely,” Ross sneered. He shook his head. “I’m done with this. If the Asgardians want to stay, fine, but I want him locked up at the very least. If I could have my way, he’d be executed.”

            Tony stared at Ross in disbelief. “I knew you were an asshole Ross but I hadn’t realized you were completely heartless. Between the two of you, Loki’s more human than you’ll ever be.” He pointed to the doors behind them. “Get out.”

            Ross glared at him for a few moments then turned and stormed from the room. Tony let out a small sigh of relief. That was one problem temporarily solved. He turned back to the brothers. Thor looked back at him, his expression full of desperation. Tony moved back over to the two.

            “He won’t hear me,” Thor said.

            Tony squeezed his shoulder. “Keep talking to him.” He knelt back down beside Thor. “Loki, it’s Tony. Do you know where you are? We’re in the assembly hall of the U.N.. Do you remember that? You’re safe. Thor’s here. We won’t let anyone hurt you.”

            “I’m right here brother,” he reached for Loki but Tony caught his wrist.

            “Ask him if it’s okay for you to touch him first. If he allows it move slowly otherwise you’ll end up spooking him. Last time that happened well,” he motioned to the broken furniture.

            Thor shifted until he was sitting cross-legged in front to of Loki. “Brother, may I touch you?” Loki didn’t respond. Thor wiped tears from his eyes. “All right, I’m right here Loki and I won’t leave until you’re ready. Loki? Brother can you hear me?”

            Thor continued talking to Loki and eventually Loki began to slowly blink. His breathing slowed as his gaze started to move around. His eyes finally focused on Thor. “B-b-brother?”

            “Yes Loki. I’m right here.”

            Loki watched Thor warily, almost as if he couldn’t trust his eyes. In a small voice he asked, “Y-you came for me?”

            “Yes,” Thor slowly reached out and gently lowered Loki’s hands from his head.

            Loki blinked again, his eyes beginning to droop. His whole body went limp and he slumped to the side as he finally passed out. Thor cradled him close and Tony could see he was trying his hardest to keep from breaking down.

            Tony let out a sigh. “Let’s get him back to his room.”

            Thor stood carefully, nestling Loki close. Together they returned to Loki’s quarters. Tony ran a hand through his hair. This whole day had turned into a shit show. He wanted nothing more than to take both Ross and Nebula out back and beat them bloody. He knew he couldn’t do that, as satisfying as it would be. Right now, his friends needed him and he would do whatever he could to help. If it meant having to dispose of a body later then so be it.

* * *

            Awareness returned to Loki slowly. The last thing he remembered was being left alone in his cell. Whatever he was currently laying on was much softer than the cold stone had been. Which begged the question, where was he?

            He blinked his eyes open and noticed immediately that he could see from both of them. His left eye had obviously grown back. He moved his tongue and felt that had returned as well. Loki could feel that his right arm had grown back too. How long had he been out?

            He looked around the room, it appeared to be Midgardian. Why would they give him the illusion of Midgard?

            Loki moved to roll onto his back and bumped into something as he did so. He froze, fear running through him. He felt the warmth of a body behind him. Had they decided to return to _that_ form of torture? The body moved and Loki tried to hold back his whimper of fear.

            “Loki?” That was Thor’s voice.

            _Norns, Norns please don’t use an image of Thor to—_

            “Are you awake brother?”

            Loki slowly turned his head towards the voice. In the dim light, Thor looked tired. Confusion overtook fear for the moment. There was no hate in Thor’s eyes. He looked... older and one of his eyes was the wrong color. Thor continued to watch him.

            “Are you thirsty?” Thor stood from the bed and grabbed a bottle of water. “You’ve been sleeping for a few hours. Tony went out to get us something to eat.”

            Tony? Loki didn’t know anybody named Tony... No wait, he did. Tony Stark aka Iron Man.

            Loki slowly sat up against the headboard. “What happened?”

            Thor returned to sit by Loki. “I was hoping you could tell me. Tony called me saying you were having a flashback and he couldn’t snap you out of it.” Thor opened the bottle and handed it to him. “Where did you think you were when you woke up?”

            Loki sipped slowly at the water. “My cell.”

            “In Asgard?” asked Thor though he didn’t sound like he expected that to be the answer.

            Loki bit his lip with a slight shake of his head, “no.”

            Thor took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Thanos?” he asked softly.

            Loki nodded, feeling tears beginning to well in his eyes.

            “Will you tell me?”

            He shook his head feeling the tears fall. “You’ll hate me.”

            “No Loki I won’t. I don’t know what happened to you, not really. Yes, Nebula explained some of what happened but... Brother please, what can I do to help you”

            Loki scrubbed at his eyes. He’d already made a fool of himself earlier. He refused to give them more reason to call him weak. He stood from the bed. “You shouldn’t have come. You have too much to do with rebuilding.”

            “You needed me.”

            “I was fine.”

            “No you weren’t.” Thor followed after him. “Loki, you’ve been there for me whenever I’ve been low. I’m here for you.”

            “But you weren’t,” Loki clenched his eyes shut, more tears breaking free. “I needed you and you weren’t there.” Loki shook with a combination of anger and pain. He whirled around on Thor. “I called for you every day for _months_! _No one came for me!_ They took—” He swallowed, “They took my eyes, my tongue, my limbs.

            “Every day they would cut off something new then ask me where Odin had hidden the Tesseract. They would offer to take the pain away if I would just tell them. I refused as long as I could. They used the scepter on me until I no longer knew which memories were real and which ones weren’t.

            “I started to believe the lies they were telling me. I thought, maybe I really did want a throne. Maybe… Maybe I could prove to everyone that I was your equal. That I didn’t have to be pushed to the shadows. That I could be more than the monster I was born as.”

            Thor looked horrified at Loki’s words. “Loki…”

            “ _You left me there!_ ” Loki screeched, rushing forward and pushing against Thor. “You all left me there and when I finally came back _no one_ asked why I was different. You all assumed the worst because of something I have no control over.” Thor’s arms wrapped around him and Loki’s legs gave out. “I called and called and no one came. You left me there,” he cried.

            Together they fell to the floor. “We didn’t know,” Thor sobbed. “I swear brother, we didn’t know. We thought you were dead.”

            “But I wasn’t,” Loki gripped at Thor’s shirt, his tears leaving wet patches on the fabric. “No one came a-and no one asked me w-w-why.”

            “I’m sorry. If I had known you’d lived I would have brought the armies of Asgard down upon Thanos to rescue you.” He let out a soft chuckle and squeezed Loki. “Mother and Father would have led them. Thanos would not have stood a chance against Mother’s wrath.”

            Loki found he could imagine it. Their mother was a force to be reckoned with when she was protecting her sons. She may have been Asgard’s queen but she was a fierce warrior in her own right. She had taught Loki how to fight more than anyone. It was because of her teachings that Loki was able to fight and use seiðr simultaneously. It was an ability rarely seen.

            They sat in silence for a time. Loki’s sobs slowing and his tears drying on his cheeks. Thor continued to hold him and Loki found himself taking comfort in his presence.

            “Loki?” Thor asked tentatively. “You said… you said they… they took things from you. I don’t understand.”

            Loki sighed deeply. He knew what Thor asked even if his brother seemed unable to actually say the words. “You want to know how I still have the body parts they removed.” Thor made a noise like a whine. Loki shifted a little against Thor’s chest. “I knew I healed much faster than normal because of my seiðr. I never knew…” He blew a large breath through his nose. “Turns out if I lose a limb my seiðr will regenerate it. I think that’s why I survived Thanos breaking my neck. They would remove a limb or an eye, something, just to see how long it would take to grow back. There was one time where… where they strapped me to a table and cut my chest open just to see if I would survive.” He turned his head and buried his face against Thor’s chest. “I was awake the whole time.”

            Thor squeezed him again. “I’m so sorry you had to suffer that. I’m sorry I didn’t ask. I’m sorry for everything.”

            With a sigh, Loki pushed away so he could look at his brother. “I know I should have said something sooner but… I thought, if I buried it deep and never spoke about it then I’d never have to actually face it. When Nebula started showing them what they’d done to me it took me right back there.”

            There was a knock at the door right before it opened to reveal Tony carrying a few bags. “Hey you’re awake.” He set the bags down on the nearby table. “You had us worried there. You know what, actually, you freaked me the fuck out. How are you feeling?” His brow furrowed, “Why are you guys on the floor?”

            At Tony’s look of utter confusion, Loki started laughing. He leaned back against Thor who looked just as confused as Tony did. Loki wasn’t laughing because he thought anything was funny. All of his emotions had finally come to a head and he didn’t feel like crying anymore. He’d done enough of that.

            “I’m sorry,” Loki said between breaths. He wiped fresh tears from his eyes.

            “You have nothing to apologize for,” Tony said. “I get it. I can’t imagine what you went through but I get the hysterical laughter after a good cry.” He gestured to the food on the table. “So I got a little bit of everything. I know Thor eats enough to feed an army so this is more to tide us over for the moment.” He picked up a plastic bag and pulled out a tub of ice cream. “I also decided to be cliché and grabbed rocky road in case you needed a good cry.”

            “What does ice cream have to do with crying?” Thor asked.

            “It’s a thing,” Tony replied. “Like I said, cliché.”

            Loki and Thor stood and Loki sat on the bed. He wasn’t really hungry but he knew he would need to eat something. Thor dug through the bags and came back with a tin of spaghetti. He twirled the noodles around his fork. “How do you feel?”

            “Worn out,” Loki replied with a sigh. “I still need return to plead our case to the delegates.”

            “About that,” Tony said drawing the brother’s attention. “I ran into Ambassador Juul earlier. She said she wishes you well and also to let you know the town of Tønsberg is yours if you want it.”

            Loki couldn’t have heard right. “What?”

            “Norway took a vote. They would like for you to rebuild there.”

            Thor put his food to the side and hugged Loki. “You did it brother. Our people have a home.”

            Loki was glad he’d accomplished his goal. Asgard would rebuild but... “I’m sorry for earlier.”

            “Don’t be. Ross is an ass and honestly,” Tony sighed, “I can’t say I’m surprised he pulled that stunt. I just wish you hadn’t had to relive what you did.”

            “We’ve never actually spoken about what happened during the year you were gone,” Thor said. “I won’t force you to talk about it if you don’t want to but if you do need an ear I will listen.”

            Flippantly Tony said, “And, you know, if you need help hiding a body I know people who know people.”

            “What body?” asked Thor.

            “Ross,” Loki and Tony said at his same time.

            Loki sighed. “As enjoyable as that would be I won’t jeopardize the decision that has been made. Though I say nothing about pranks.”

            “Loki...”

            Loki affected a look of innocence. “Just a little prank. Nothing major just... bald head and neon pink beard. Who needs eyebrows anyway?”

            Thor could only shake his head while Tony burst out laughing.

            Loki wished he could forget everything that had happened to him while he was a prisoner of Thanos. He wished he could go back and not let go of Gungnir. So much could have been different if he’d just held on. He couldn’t change it though and as much as those memories hurt he did have some solace.

            He had people who cared for him. Tony had fought for him and Thor had come rushing to his side when Loki had needed him. He had Pepper, who mothered he and Thor, and Morgan, who brightens everything around her. Sure, things would have been different if he hadn’t let go but then he wouldn’t have what he did now and honestly, Loki wouldn’t trade that for the worlds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't resist the brothers dealing with the Atomic Diaper. That whole scene took on a life of its own. I also enjoyed writing Thor as the caregiver for a change. Loki really needed that release and I have no idea how he's managed to keep it all in for so long. Then again, Dean Winchester school of dealing with feelings. Nuff said I guess.


	5. Forth Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Stark family visit New Asgard. Loki and Thor take Morgan Trick or Treating and Loki tells Morgan a bedtime story of an adventure from their youth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what happened. I don't try for these long chapters but this one is just under 9K words. I tried to keep this chapter as mostly fluff but the boys can't go without a little angst. Luckily it's not anywhere near as bad as the last chapter. I also wasn't trying to make Loki the favorite uncle but that's the way it's gone. Poor Thor.
> 
> I've taken some creative liberties for one part. I won't say what it is here since it would spoil it. Also, I know that on average children Morgan's age don't really talk as well as I've had her do. However, that being said, some children do take up language a lot sooner than others. Given who her parents are I can see Morgan forming sentences at such a young age.
> 
> Just a random note. The Norwegian ambassador mentioned in the previous chapter is the actual name of the current ambassador. Thanks Google.
> 
> Enjoy!

**Forth Year**

            The building of New Asgard was a slow process. Tønsberg had been derelict, with only a few Midgardians still living on the outskirts. With help from Tony Stark, some of the remaining Avengers and the Norwegian government, they had quickly brought life back to the old village. Physically at least, emotionally was a different story.

            It hadn’t helped that in the few months after the summit Loki had suffered severe nightmares and occasional flashbacks about his time spent as Thanos’s captive. Thor hadn’t had any idea of how to help Loki but he’d been sure to be there whenever his brother had needed him. Loki had tried to handle the problem on his own but in the end he’d told Thor, Tony and Pepper _everything_. Thor had cried for hours for his brother after hearing his pain.

            Their move to Norway had ended his sessions with Dr. Silva. Something Thor could see hadn’t help his condition. The number of responsibilities he now had, had caused Thor’s condition to relapse. He’d taken to excessive drinking once more. The past month alone had been terrible.

            Thor kept glancing at the clock on the wall though he was trying to not make it obvious. There had only been a handful of council members to survive the destruction of Asgard and the attack on the _Statesman._ They were once again going over the status of rebuilding. The progress so far was well beyond anything Thor could have hoped for. His only wish right now was that Loki was suffering the advisors instead of preparing for Tony and Pepper’s arrival.

            Hearing his name, Thor realized he’d let his mind wander. “Forgive me,” he said, “what did you say?”

            Askr, one of the older members, frowned slightly at him. “An heir, your majesty. With our numbers so diminished and the royal family decimated, it only stands to reason that you take a wife and produce an heir. As it stands, there is no line of succession. Perhaps the Valkyrie would make a suitable wife.”

            Thor’s eyebrows shot up. Was the man kidding? For one, Thor was nowhere near ready to take a wife nor was he in any kind of state to do so. For another, all told he’d only known Valkyrie for a handful of months. She was a friend and Thor didn’t ever see them becoming more.

            Another thought occurred to him. “I do have an heir.”

            This time it was Thor who received the raised eyebrows. “You have a child?” asked Ragna, one of the only two female members.

            “No I—” Thor pinched the bridge of his nose and stood. “I’m calling this meeting to a close.” He left the table shaking his head. “An heir,” he muttered to himself.

            Thor burst out of the meeting hall and took a deep breath of fresh air. He suppressed a groan when he heard the counselors following after him. He turned back to them. “I need to prepare for our guests.”

            “While we appreciate all the Midgardians have done for us we cannot rely completely on them.”

            “I’m not,” Thor felt his ire begin to rise, “however they are my friends and I will not ignore them while they are here.”

            “We still need to discuss your heir,” Askr said.

            Before Thor could reply an excited scream drew their attention. A very happy soon-to-be two year old was toddling towards him. “T’or, T’or, T’or!”

            With a smile, Thor knelt down as Morgan ran into his arms. He lifted her up, laughing as he did so. “Well hello little one. You’re getting so big.”

            Morgan began talking to him. He was only able to understand a little of what she said as she spoke so fast. He simply nodded and pretended to follow along with what she was saying.

            Thor saw Tony and Pepper following closely after her. “Sorry about that,” Tony said. “She saw you and couldn’t get to Uncle Thor fast enough.”

            “It’s no trouble,” Thor said as he adjusted Morgan to sit on his hip. “As a matter of fact, your timing couldn’t have been better.”

            “My king...” Thor turned to the man who seemed to rethink what he was about to say. “We shall return to the matter at a later time.”

            “Did we interrupt something?” Pepper asked.

            “Nope,” Thor said, making a popping noise on the ‘p’ which caused Morgan to giggle. “My counselors think they’re comedians.”

            All five of the counselors failed at not looking offended. “We are simply planning for the future of New Asgard,” Ragna huffed.

            “And I said I did not need to ‘produce an heir’,” Tony and Pepper’s eyebrows shot up at Thor’s words, “since I already have one. As a matter of fact, since apparently it isn’t obvious, I name Loki as Crown Prince and next in line to the throne.”

            “Ki?” Morgan asked, looking around for the dark-haired trickster.

            “But...” sputtered Jari, a middle-aged Æsir, “his crimes removed him from the line of succession.”

            “We’ve learned a lot more about the truth behind them. Besides, I am king and I can choose anyone I want as my heir. I chose my brother. _End_ of discussion.”

            For a moment, it looked as if his councilors were going to continue to argue but seemed to think better of it. The five of them shared resigned looks before returning inside the meeting hall. Thor let out a sigh of relief. He did not want to deal with _that_ again.

            “They didn’t look too happy about that,” remarked Tony.

            “I don’t really care,” Thor replied. He motioned for them to follow him and they began the walk back to the home Thor and Loki shared. “They seem to conveniently forget that Loki ever had a legitimate claim to the throne.”

            “I thought your people had welcomed Loki’s return,” Pepper said.

            “The people, yes, the councilors, not so much. They’re old and _very_ set in their ways. They have always known Loki had been adopted, though not where he was adopted from I don’t think. Either way, that’s still a sore subject for my brother.” Thor sighed. “They want an heir with blood ties to Odin but the real reason I think they don’t want Loki to have a claim is because he fooled them for years.

            “I spoke to the people about what Loki’s rule had been like. While the rest of the Nine may have begun to decline, Asgard itself had flourished. He’d strengthened our defenses, increased the army. I think he had been preparing Asgard for Thanos’s incursion.

            “Outwardly it may have appeared he’d been lax but in reality Loki was a good king. It’s that fact, actually, that the counselors hate the most. If it hadn’t been for Hela,” here Thor shook his head, “who knows how things would have turned out.”

            “How is Loki doing?” Pepper asked.

            “He’s all right. We both have good days and bad ones. He’s having more good than bad now and he hasn’t had any flashbacks recently. I think working on the garden helps.” They continued on, walking up the dirt road leading to his home. Halfway up the road Thor realized, “where are your bags?”

            “I dropped them off earlier,” Tony replied, “while Pepper and Morgan walked around town. This place is really coming together nicely.”

            Thor nodded. “Thank you. I think a lot of it has to do with Loki. He’s been pretty opinionated about things. I told him no giant statues though.”

            “I wish I could have seen that.”

            Now Thor rolled his eyes. “It was so tacky.”

            “You’re just jealous,” Loki appeared on the porch, “you didn’t have one.”

            “Ki!” Morgan exclaimed, wiggling out of Thor’s arms and running to Loki who picked her up, tossing her in the air slightly. She wrapped her little arms around Loki’s neck to hug him.

            “And now that she’s seen Merlin,” remarked Tony drily, “everyone else is chopped liver.”

            “Your daughter has good taste,” Loki said as he adjusted Morgan to sit on his hip. “I can’t help it if I’m her favorite.” He turned his focus on her. “Have you been a _mischievous_ little girl?”

            Morgan nodded vigorously, “Yep.”

            Loki smiled, “Good, now…” He tapped his chin with a finger in thought. “What should mischievous little girl’s get?”

            Morgan shrugged, her own expression scrunching up in thought. “St’ry?”

            “A story? Hm…?”

            Thor knew Morgan loved whenever Loki told her stories since he would accompany those stories with his illusions. Even if he were reading to her, his illusions would play out before her eyes.

            Biting her lip, she asked, “candy?”

            “I don’t know...”

            Morgan huffed then seemed to catch a whiff of the same thing Thor just had. “Cookies!”

            “Cookies,” Loki agreed, heading back inside.

            Thor and the others followed as well. The aroma of chocolate chip cookies filled the home. Thor spotted a fresh batch cooling on the table. He reached for one only to have a dagger embed itself in the table beside his hand. Thor flinched, pulling his hand back quickly. “Loki!”

            He heard Tony snort laughter and Pepper turn hers into a cough. “Those ones just came out.” Loki pointed to a plate on the counter. “You want one, take one of those.”

            Thor pointed to the dagger. “Did you have to damage the table?”

            Loki waved his hand and both the dagger and damage disappeared. “Happy?”

            “That wasn’ v’ry nice Ki,” Morgan said.

            “Maybe not but it was fun.” Loki held up a cookie for her with a raised eyebrow. “Do you want the cookie?”

            Morgan nodded, “Uh huh.”

            “You can have one but,” he pulled the snack just out of Morgan’s reach, “I seem to recall something you’ve yet to give me.” He tipped his head to the side slightly.

            Morgan gasped, “kissy.” She kissed Loki on the cheek and he finally gave her the cookie. She bit into it, chocolate sticking to her lips as she did so.

            Thor took one of his own from the plate then offered Tony and Pepper one as well. They each took one.

            “Wow, these are good.” Tony said in surprise. “When did you learn to cook?”

            “Centuries ago,” Loki replied. “Baking was actually something our mother loved to do. She would have Thor and I help her.” He shrugged, “We both learned how to cook from her. It was something she said we needed to learn, especially once we began adventuring.”

            “You remember the sweet bread she would make?” Thor asked.

            Loki smiled. “Remember when we ate that whole batch of pepperkake?”

            “And the bløtkake? Mother was so angry with us.”

            “I think she laughed at us in private. Norns, we were so sick we thought we were dying.”

            “For the rest of the class who doesn’t know what you’re talking about,” Tony chimed in.

            “Basically ginger snaps and a cream cake,” answered Thor.

            “If you make her sick you get to deal with it,” Pepper said.

            “That’s why we limit to,” Loki wiped the chocolate from around Morgan’s mouth, “just to one for now.”

            Morgan’s lips jut out in a small pout. She clasped her hands before her, “Pwease.”

            “I have something better.” The look she gave Loki said she doubted that. “Would you like to see our garden?”

            Morgan tilted her head to the side, “garden?” she asked.

            “There are fairies.”

            Her eyes lit up. “Really? Like Tink?”

            “Like Tink,” Loki agreed. He put her down, taking her hand to lead her to their garden.

            Thor chuckled to himself as they all followed. Along the way Tony whispered, “Are there really fairies?”

            “No,” Thor replied just as low. He had no intention of dashing Morgan’s hopes. “It’s just Loki’s illusions.”

            They left the house and walked down a short path behind it. The sweet fragrance of flowers reached them before the garden itself came into view. Thor saw little flashes of light dancing around the leaves. Loki let go of Morgan’s hand and she began to chase the lights, giggling as she did so. Thor couldn’t help but smile.

            They entered the garden, Thor feeling a sense of peace wash over him. They had both been working on the garden, Thor even traveling to Vanaheim for a tree that resembled the Japanese cherry blossom trees except the flowers were purple. Their mother had had a tree just like it in her own garden. It had been one of her favorites. Thor stopped short when his eyes fell on a marble bench beneath the tree.

            He’d stopped so abruptly that Tony had run into him. “Hey, what— oh...”

            There on the bench, regal and beautiful and so very _real,_ was a projection of their mother. Thor felt his chest tighten. He knew it wasn’t really her, she wasn’t alive but he still had the urge to run to her, to feel her embrace and take comfort in it.

            When Morgan caught sight of the figure, she stopped chasing the witch lights and watched the figure. She waved to the image of their mother shyly and to Thor’s surprise, the image waved back. _You’re an idiot,_ he thought to himself, _of course Loki would make it move._

            Morgan wrapped an arm around Loki’s leg, pressing her face against his thigh, “who is that?” she asked. “Is she a fairy?”

            Loki chuckled, placing a hand on her head and gently brushing her hair back from her face. “No, she isn’t a fairy. She’s a queen.”

            Morgan looked up at Loki in awe. “A queen? Really?” She ran forward and reached out for the images’ hand only to have her fingers go straight through it. She turned back to them, clearly confused.

            Loki knelt down to be eyelevel with the toddler. “She’s… she’s not really here. This is just a memory of her.” Morgan continued to look confused, looking back and forth between the illusion and his brother. Loki must have realized Morgan didn’t understand. “You know how I can make things appear,” to which a pixie appeared between them.

            Morgan nodded, “magic.”

            “Exactly, well I’ve used my magic to bring her here. You see, she had to go away before you were born. She can’t really ever come back here.”

            “Why?”

            “She just can’t sweetie.”

            Thor knew there was no way a child would understand death. He shared a look with Tony and Pepper. They looked just as lost as he felt.

            “But why?” Morgan asked again.

            “Sometimes people have to go away and they can never come back. She had a garden just like this at our old home so I made an image of her to be here.”

            “Okay,” She said, though Thor doubted she truly understood. She looked back and forth again between the image of their mother, Loki and himself. Her little eyes widened as she seemed to realize something. In awe she asked, “Is she your mommy?”

            “She is,” Thor replied, “here name was Frigga.”

            “Figga?”

            “Close enough.”

            “She’s pretty.”

            “She was very pretty,” Loki said, standing. There was a sheen to his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

            Pepper stepped forward and reached out a hand for her daughter. “How about we look around the garden then we can go back inside for more cookies?”

            “‘Kay,” Morgan took her mother’s hand and together they and Tony wandered further into the garden. Tony glanced back at them momentarily and Thor nodded him on.

            After they were out of sight, he watched as the illusion of their mother dissolved in a green mist. Thor placed a hand on Loki’s shoulder. “Are you all right?”

            Loki swallowed hard and blinked a few times but the sheen to his eyes didn’t go away. “I suppose I hadn’t realized just how much I missed her until now.” He used his sleeve to wipe at his eyes. “It didn’t seem right to recreate her garden and not have her in it.” They remained silent for a while, simply taking in the beauty of the garden. Eventually Loki asked, “What about you? You’ve looked like something was wrong ever since you came back from the meeting. Are the councilors giving you a hard time?”

            Thor sighed. “It’s not that.” He shrugged one shoulder, “they are annoying me endlessly with things that we have no control over right now. They’re not happy with Tony’s continued financial support but…” he sighed again.

            “I’m sensing there’s more to it. I know they aren’t happy that you made me your head advisor.”

            “I’d always planned on making you my head advisor.” Thor rubbed a hand down his face. “That wasn’t the problem today. Before I ended the meeting they brought up a subject I honestly hadn’t thought about, at all.”

            Loki’s brow furrowed, “What’s that?”

            “An heir. They said I needed to consider taking a wife and producing an heir.”

            Loki shrugged. “They aren’t entirely wrong. Their timing was poor but it is something that you do need to consider. Unless we change how New Asgard will be governed, you will need an heir. Let me guess, they suggested Val?”

            Thor groaned. “Yes but I don’t see that working at all. I don’t have any kind of romantic feelings towards her and I doubt I ever will.”

            Loki gave him a sympathetic look. “Well we both knew neither of us would marry for love. I would suggest someone from Vanaheim perhaps but I’m not sure if that would work.”

            “No,” Thor said, moving to sit on the bench. “I have no intention of taking a wife, especially since we’re still rebuilding.”

            “It might be something to consider,” Loki said, taking a seat beside Thor. “It might lift the people’s spirits to see a strong royal family and knowing that it will continue on.”

            “I thought we were a strong family.”

            This time it was Loki who sighed. “You and I, yes. We’re not quite as strong as we used to be but we’re getting there.”

            “Good. Not that it really matters, erm, the heir thing, not the strong family thing.”

            Loki chuckled, “Okay, why do I get the feeling there’s more to this story?”

            Thor shifted in his seat. “Well, I told the councilors that I didn’t need to ‘produce an heir’ since I already have one.”

            “You have a child?” Loki asked.

            “Why does everyone keep asking me that?” Thor stood, taking a few steps away from the bench. “No, I do not have a child. I’m talking about _you_ Loki. _You’re_ my heir.”

            Loki looked back at him in surprise. It actually turned something in Thor’s stomach. Why hadn’t this been obvious to anyone? It had seemed so simple to Thor. Had Loki truly not seen that he was next in line?

            “Wow,” Loki said after a moment. “I can honestly say I hadn’t expected that. I imagine the counselors weren’t too happy with your choice.”

            No, and their attitude towards Loki angered Thor. “They were not,” he said with a sigh. “I don’t understand why this comes as such a surprise to everyone. Father never removed you from the line of succession, I checked. I know your last time as King was a little unorthodox—”

            “Both times everyone thought I’d hatched some evil plot to take the throne. When you were banished the counselors _gave_ me Gungnir. The second time I took it, well, they might have been right.”

            Which reminded Thor of something he’d never gotten the chance to ask. “Why did you enchant father and send him here?”

            “There’s a loaded question.” Loki said with a hint of sarcasm. “There wasn’t really just one reason. Part of it was I wanted to prove it could do it. Another was, after I returned from Startvlheim he frightened me. We’d seen him angry before but I think mother’s death sent him over the edge. He didn’t care about anything and in fact seemed ready to make war on anyone who looked at him wrong. I didn’t... I didn’t recognize him.”

            “That was you I spoke with when I returned to Asgard, not father, wasn’t it?”

            “Yes,” Loki said with a nod of his head. “I hadn’t sent him here yet. At that time I didn’t know what to do with him. He’d fallen into something like the Odinsleep but it wasn’t that. I kept him locked in his room. I wanted to talk to him when he woke. I’m not sure I would have told him anything, let alone the truth.”

            “Why didn’t you tell anyone you were alive?”

            “Fear, mostly. I also hadn’t expected to live. I could feel the poison burning through me and at the time thought I could finally stop running. When I woke up... I didn’t want to return to my cell and also, I was afraid everyone would think I’d tricked you so that I could escape, even with the scar.”

            Thor had seen the jagged scar on Loki’s chest along with the matching one on his back. Thor had thought he would be sick the first time he saw it. It had been another reminder of his failure to protect his little brother. Though Thor couldn’t really blame Loki for not saying anything. Given Thor’s attitude at the time, he probably wouldn’t have believed him. That thought sickened Thor more than anything.

            “I’m sorry you had to suffer alone.”

            Loki sighed deeply. “Neither of us was ready to listen. Do I wish things could have been different? Absolutely, but I think... I think we’ve both grown much because of it. Strangely enough, I think you and I are closer now than we have been in decades, maybe centuries.”

            Their closeness was the one thing Thor was most grateful for. He realized they had gotten completely off topic. “The people still refer to your as ‘Prince Loki’ so it won’t be any change to them. I think we should have a feast. A large one, invite our friends and maybe even the surrounding villages.” He grinned wider and perhaps a bit crazed. “Rub it in the counselor’s faces.”

            Loki grimaced, “For the love of all that is holy, never make that face again.”

            Thor laughed, crossing his eyes to make his expression even more ridiculous. “Why not? It’s how you smile.”

            “I do not. Even if I wanted to do the crazed psycho killer smile I wouldn’t look anywhere near as ugly as you.”

            “I’m ruggedly handsome.”

            “You were beaten with an ugly stick after that ugly stick had been beaten by another ugly stick.”

            “You’re an ass.”

            “T’or said a bad word!”

            Loki burst out laughing at Morgan’s cry. Thor looked up to see Tony, Pepper and Morgan making their way back towards them.

            “What do we do to people who say bad words?” Tony asked his daughter.

            Confidently Morgan said, “Stab them.”

            Loki snorted and Thor looked over to see his brother covering his mouth with his hand clearly trying to hide his smile while poorly attempting to look innocent.

            “What?” Tony cried. “No. We do not stab him.” He pointed to Loki. “Stop being a poor influence on my kid Mr. Stabby McStabber.”

            Loki moved to stand beside Thor. “I am nothing of the sort.”

            Loki’s hand moved fast and Thor clearly felt a jab in his side. He gave a small grunt. At least Loki hadn’t actually used a knife this time. Tony ran a hand down his face though Thor couldn’t tell if it was in amusement or frustration.

            “I want more cookies,” Loki announced suddenly. He held out a hand to Morgan who eagerly took it. He made a gesture with his free hand and a dagger manifested. He glanced back at the three of them, grinning wide. “Now, if you want to stab someone,” Loki told Morgan, “you need to get in between the ribs.”

* * *

            _“Morgan has been practically bouncing off the walls. She can’t wait for you and Thor to take her Trick or Treating. When do you two plan to be here?”_

            Loki tipped his head to press his phone against his shoulder so he could have both hands free and continued to cut up his apple. “Tomorrow afternoon barring any unforeseen circumstances.”

            _“How’s Thor doing anyway?”_

            “Today has been one of his harder days. He isn’t happy with me right now since I’ve hidden all of the alcohol in my dimensional pocket.”

            _“You have_ got _to tell me how you do that.”_

            Loki felt a smile cross his lips. “It’s just simple seiðr manipulation. It is not my fault you have no inclination towards it.”

            He could practically hear Tony’s eye roll. _“Whatever Merlin. Just be prepared to have your own personal cling-on. She’s also going through a princess phase so there’s that too.”_

“I’m sure I’ll be able to handle it.” A crash from the back of the house drew his attention. “Let me call you back.” He hung up, dropping his knife and phone onto the counter. He made his way towards where the crash came from to find Thor in their small storage room moving boxes around. “What are you doing?”

            Thor pushed another box over to inspect the contents of the one below it. He turned wild eyes on Loki. “Where is it?”

            Loki had a good idea of what Thor was talking about but decided to play dumb anyway, “Where’s what?”

            “The alcohol.”

            “Oh that,” Loki said with a wave of his hand. “I threw it all away.”

            Thor looked startled by that. “What, why?”

            “Because I will not have you drunk off your ass around little Morgan. Did you forget about our visit?”

            Thor rolled his eyes and scratched at his unruly hair. Loki wondered when the last time his brother had washed or changed his clothes. If Loki wasn’t mistaken, Thor had been wearing those same sweatpants for at least a week.

            “I will be fine. I have until the end of the month.”

            “Thor, it _is_ the end of the month. We leave tonight.”

            Thor looked startled by this. “No it’s,” he shook his head, “it’s only the beginning of October.” He looked at Loki with an expression of confusion, “isn’t it?”

            Loki blinked at Thor, his worry spiking. “It’s the twenty-seventh.”

            Thor dropped to the floor and put his head in his hands. “I… I didn’t realize.”

            Loki sat beside his brother. This was the longest that Thor had lost time. He may lose a day or two because of his melancholy but to lose nearly a whole month, it had never happened before and it worried Loki greatly.

            “Thor, I’m beginning to think you need to see a therapist again.”

            Thor shook his head, turning to glare at Loki. “They can do nothing for me.”

            “It helped you before. Why do you think it wouldn’t help now?”

            “I refuse to force someone else to deal with my problems.”

            Loki resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “For one, they get paid to listen to people’s problems. For another, I really do think it is something you need. Hel, _I_ talk to a therapist now. Besides, you cannot drink away all of your problems.”

            “I can try,” Thor said petulantly.

            “Dear brother mine,” Loki said, leaning into Thor’s personal space, “do you honestly believe I would let you?”

            Thor seemed to mull it over. “No,” he eventually replied. “You keep me from what I need.”

            “The alcohol, most definitely. Hel if Valkyrie was able to become sober then so can you and she’d been drinking for centuries. In the case of all your junk food, at the rate you were going you were going to end up looking like Volstagg and that would not in any way be a compliment.”

            Looking at his brother though, Loki began to think the junk food was the only source of calories Thor had taken in. He joked about Thor becoming fat but the fact of the matter was Thor was losing body mass, not gaining it.

            Thor put his head back in his hands. “It’s so _hard_.”

            Loki leaned his head against Thor’s shoulder, “I know it is.” He poked Thor in his not so muscular thigh. They were going to have to work on that too. “But our surrogate niece will be pleased to see us.” Reaching up he tugged at Thor’s bushy beard, “and do something with this. You’re beginning to look like a caveman.”

            Thor batted him away, mood suddenly lighter. “I like my beard.”

            “If you don’t do _something_ with it I’m going to shave it off. Maybe in your sleep and I won’t just stop at your beard. If you think your haircut on Sakaar was bad I’ll leave you bald.”

            “You wou—” Thor cut himself off. “Nope, you would.” He stood and fled the storage room.

            Loki smiled sadly to himself. The past several months had been especially hard on Thor. The pressure of building New Asgard along with the responsibilities of being King had caused Thor’s condition to decline. His drinking had hit levels Loki had never seen before. The Council of New Asgard (as the original five councilors were now calling themselves) had run Thor ragged. Of course it hadn’t helped that Thor had seen it as his duty to take everything upon himself.

             Loki had done all he could to run interference between Thor and the rest of the world. It had left him exhausted. The past few weeks had seen Thor either drinking himself stupid or sleeping for days on end.

            Loki stood and left the storage area. He kept an ear out for his brother and heard the shower running. He hoped their trip back to New York would brighten Thor’s spirits. He returned to the kitchen to continue cutting his apple only to realize he’d lost his appetite. Maybe he could get Thor to eat it.

            Loki had just finished cutting the apple and making cinnamon sugar when Thor entered the kitchen. He looked much better, his beard trimmed though his hair hung flat. Loki put the food on the table and gestured for Thor to sit.

            “I’m not—”

            “Eat.”

            Thor huffed but sat and took a couple slices of the apple. Loki pulled a chair closer to his brother. He sat, brushing his fingers through Thor’s wet hair, using his seiðr to separate the dark strands behind his left ear from the blonde. He silently braided the hair and when he was done rubbed the top of Thor’s head to completely mess up the rest of his hair.

            Thor batted Loki’s hand away, “‘top phat.”

            “Don’t talk with your mouth full.”

            Thor swallowed his bite and smoothed his hair back down. “Is it really the end of October?”

            “It is,” Loki replied softly. “I know you’ve felt like you’ve needed to take on all of New Asgard’s problems but you need to take care of yourself as well. You’re no help to anyone if you run yourself into the ground.”

            “I know.” He took another apple slice and dipped it into the sugar. “I just feel like, as king, I need to be involved in everything.”

            “Even father wasn’t involved in everything. That’s what he had his advisors for. That’s what you have me for. I take great pleasure in driving the councilors crazy.”

            “I enjoy watching you do it.”

            “We need new blood.”

            “I’ll put Tony on the council.”

            Loki laughed at the thought. He stopped, looked at Thor and together they said, “Pepper.”

* * *

            Loki and Thor arrived at the cabin just after lunch the following day. Tony hadn’t been exaggerating when he’d said that Morgan was bouncing off the walls. The two-year-old was nothing but a ball of energy, especially once she’d spotted her uncles.

            “Ki! T’or!”

            Morgan barreled towards them and Thor swept her up into his arms before she could reach Loki. He spun her around, Morgan squealing in delight. “Miss us?” Thor asked.

            “Uh huh. Want see my room?”

            Thor put her down and she led him up the stairs. Loki stayed behind to greet Pepper and Tony.

            “How are you doing?” Pepper asked him as she pulled back from her hug.

            “I’m alright,” Loki replied.

            Neither of them looked entirely convinced. “How’s Thor doing?” Tony asked.

            Loki sighed. “Better than he was yesterday. I needed to get him away from the responsibility of running New Asgard. The counselors,” Loki shook his head, “if they weren’t so vital to the day-to-day operations, I think I would have murdered them all by now.”

            “Ouch, that bad?”

            “They seem to think New Asgard will someday become what old Asgard was and are trying to run everything as if nothing has changed. Even the people are becoming frustrated.”

            “I’m sure they know you both are doing your best,” Pepper said.

            “We’ve actually been going behind the counselors’ backs and have gotten the Asgardians involved. It’s working so far.”

            “That’s good.”

            “Ki!” Morgan yelled from the top of the stairs, “Come see my room.”

            Loki felt a smile tugging at his lips. “I’m coming.” He went upstairs and stopped in the doorway to her room. Loki felt his eyebrows rise. “When you said she was going through a princess phase...”

            “Yeah...” Tony said. “It has kind of gotten out of control.”

            That was an understatement. There was pink _everywhere,_ along with just about every Disney Princess doll and... Was that a child size Cinderella doll?

            “You like?” Morgan asked.

            “It’s... great.” He shared a wide eyed look with his brother. He switched to Asgard’s native tongue. “ _What in the seven hells is this?_ ”

            “ _No idea,”_ Thor replied. “ _I’m actually a bit frightened.”_

            Morgan was giving them confused looks. “What you saying?”

            Switching back to English, Loki said, “Nothing, just admiring all this pink.”

            Beside him, Tony snorted, “liar.”

            Not about to be called out by a two-year-old (which Tony may or may not resemble) Loki discretely elbowed the shorter man in the side.

            Morgan shoved a doll in Thor’s face to show him. Thor reared back, lest he lose his remaining eye. The child’s enthusiasm was infectious. “Are you going to be a princess for Halloween?” Thor asked.

            Morgan stopped, scrunching up her little nose in thought. “Daddy said no frills.”

            Loki raised an eyebrow as he glanced at Tony.

            “She wanted a tutu,” the man defended. “No self-respecting princess is going to wear a tutu.”

            “When is this Tricks or Treats?” Thor asked.

            “Her daycare is having a Trunk or Treat tonight at five. Actual Trick or Treating around the neighborhoods is tomorrow night. There are going to be a bunch of kids there and I think most of the parents are dressing up as well.”

            Loki looked at his watch. It was just nearing one thirty. He entered the room and knelt before Morgan. He had Morgan hold her arms out and began to weave his seiðr. Affecting a perfect Robin Williams as Genie voice he said, “First, that shorts and t-shirt combo is much too 1960’s. And this print,” he poked at the flowers on her shirt, “what are we trying to say, hippie? No.” A gold tape measure appeared in his hands. “Let’s work with me here.” He spun it around her until it was tied in a bow at her front and when he pulled it away there was a “poof” sound and her attire suddenly changed to that of Princess Zelda from _Twilight Princess_.

            “I like it, mui beautiful.” He’d even made her ears appear to taper to a point. “ _Now_ , still needs something. What does it say? It says ‘mode of transportation’.”

            “All right, stop!” Tony cried, laughing hysterically at Loki’s antics.

            Morgan was giggling too and when she caught sight of herself in her mirror her eyes went wide. “Daddy look! Ki made me a princess!”

            “He did,” Tony replied, seemingly just as impressed. Loki had even changed the color of her hair to a dirty blonde. “Why don’t you go show mommy?”

            Morgan ran from the room, “Mommy! Mommy look at me!”

            Tony shook his head. “Please tell me that’s not permanent.”

            “It’s not,” Loki replied, returning to his normal voice, and standing. “You can just ask Thor. I used to turn him into different things when we were children.”

            “He did,” Thor said drily. “He’d shapeshift a lot as kids too. There was this one time when he was around, eight-ish, that he turned himself into a snake. Of course, he knows I love snakes so I picked him up, not knowing it was him. Next thing I know he’s like ‘Meh, it’s me!’ and stabbed me.”

            “Always with the stabbing. Seriously, the hell is wrong with you?” Tony asked.

            Loki smirked. “In my defense, Thor was stupid enough to pick up something that could have been poisonous.”

            “You turned yourself into a garden snake!” Thor cried.

            Loki waved his words away as they left Morgan’s room. “That’s not the point. As for the stabbing,” Loki shrugged, “I started doing it as a way to defend myself. I may have been a prince but I wasn’t seen as a true warrior because of my use of seiðr, so many of the warriors would gang up on me during training. It was one of the reasons I’d learned to fight and use seiðr at the same time. Most seiðrmar have to choose between casting and fighting.”

            “Can we just refrain from teaching my daughter to cause serious bodily harm until she’s at least a teenager?”

            Acting put upon Loki said, “I suppose.”

            They reentered the living room where Morgan was showing her mother the costume Loki had created for her. Morgan continued to be a ball of energy right up to the time to leave. They bundled into the car, Morgan in her car seat between Thor and Loki. They drove for a while, Morgan chatting happily the entire way. When they arrived there were already a number of cars lined up around the rather large parking lot.

            They exited the vehicle, Pepper putting on her pointed witch hat and Tony’s Iron Man armor covering all but his head. Morgan looked back at Loki and Thor and suddenly cried, “You not gotz dress up!” She turned to her parents. “They needs dress up.”

            “Do not fret little one.” As Loki walked green shimmered around him changing his clothing into his normal leathers. That wasn’t all though, a pair of black ears sprouted from the top of his head and a long black tail grew from his backside. His incisors elongated and his fingernails became slightly pointed.

            Morgan screeched, causing one of Loki’s ears to twitch. “Kitty! Youz a kitty!”

            Tony and Pepper both laughed. “A cat?” Pepper asked.

            “Does this make you Lokitty?” Tony asked.

            Loki shrugged. “Sure and where there is Lokitty there must be Labrathor.”

            “What, no!” Thor cried but it was too late. Loki had already changed Thor’s attire to his leathers, a pair of golden ears on top his head along with a bushy golden tail. When Loki smiled, one fang peeked out from between his lips.

            Thor growled at him and slapped a hand over his mouth when it had actually come out sounding like a dog. Loki literally purred. Morgan grabbed his hand as they continued on to where the rest of the parents and children were waiting. She had a small plastic bucket to collect her candy in.

            The five of them turned heads as they approached. Many of the children openly gaped at having Iron Man and Thor there. Even some of the parents looked shocked.

            They met Morgan’s friends from daycare and their parents. Loki and Thor were a big hit with the children, especially when it became obvious that the ears and tails the brother’s sported were real. Loki regaled the children with his magic, including creating “bad guys” for the children dressed up as heroes to fight. The children were more interested in the brothers than going from car to car for candy. Much to the delight of many of the parents, nearly all of the children left the lot so tired out they were ready for bed.

            Loki returned Thor to normal but kept his feline features for Morgan’s entertainment. When it came time for Morgan to go to bed she asked for only one thing, for Loki to tell her a story.

            Loki leaned against Morgan’s bed, his chin pressed against his forearms. His tail swayed lazily behind him. “What story do you want tonight?” he asked.

            Morgan was looking through her shelves of books but didn’t appear to be able to decide upon one. She sighed the world ending sigh of a two-year-old then crawled into bed overdramatically. “I wanna hear about you an’ T’or.”

            “A story about me and Thor? Alright,” he sat up so she could crawl under her covers and he tucked her in. Once she was settled he began his story.

            “Long ago, when Thor and I were very young, our father, Odin, gave Thor a magic hammer.” An image of it appeared before them. “It was called Mjölnir and it could call forth thunder and lightning.”

            “Just like T’or?”

            “Just like Thor. Now,” the image shifted to show a teen-aged Thor and Loki. “Mjölnir was a mighty weapon and the enemies of Asgard knew that with it, Thor was unstoppable.

            “One morning, Thor frantically searched his room, for Mjölnir had gone missing. He tried to hide it at first but Thor is a _terrible_ liar and I knew something was wrong immediately.

            “‘Is something the matter, brother?’ I asked him, already knowing there was.

            “‘What?’ Thor asked me. ‘Why would you think something was wrong?’

            “‘What other reason would you have for ransacking our rooms?’ I replied. Now Mjölnir was something Thor carried with him _everywhere_ and I could see he no longer had it on him. ‘Where is your hammer?’ I asked him.

            “Thor tried to say he knew exactly where it was but I knew he didn’t. Mjölnir wasn’t something easily hidden. Now, this was before our father enchanted Mjölnir so that only Thor could lift her. I helped him search but after a while it was obvious that the hammer was gone.

            “‘We need to tell father,’ I told him.

            “‘Please not yet,’ Thor pleaded. ‘If father learns I lost Mjölnir he’ll take it back.’

            “I tried to think of where to look. Changing my form to that of a falcon, I flew across the realms until I landed in the high mountains of Vanaheim. There I came across an ugly giant by the name of Thrym.

            “‘Good day mighty Thrym,’ I said to the giant. I was wary of him as Thrym was the size of a mountain and could easily crush me. I had no intention of being squished like a bug.

            “‘Good day Prince Loki,’ boomed Thrym. ‘How fare you Silvertongue? What brings you so far from the shining halls of Asgard?’

            “‘I am ill,’ I replied, ‘for you see, someone has stolen my brother’s mighty hammer. Was it you Thyrm, mightiest of all giants, who has taken it?’

            “Thrym’s ugly visage puffed up with pride. ‘Of course I took it. Tell me little one, how fares the Mighty Thor? How mighty is he now?’

            “‘He is weak without his weapon,’ I told the giant though it was not the truth. ‘Return the hammer so that Thor and the rest of Asgard can stop grieving for the loss of Thor’s precious hammer.’

            “‘No, I think not,’ Thrym replied, crossing his massive arms. ‘I will return Mjölnir but only under one condition.’

            “I knew I had no choice but to listen to his demands. ‘What is that?’ I asked.

            “‘I will be satisfied with nothing less than the hand of the beautiful Frigga. If Frigga becomes my wife, I will return the hammer to Thor.’

            “I knew not what to say. Frigga was our mother and the thought of having to give her over to the ugly giant in order to get Thor’s hammer back was appalling. Did I mention that Thrym was also a very stupid giant? No? Well he was so I lied and agreed to the bargain. ‘Of course. What you ask is a high price to pay but I shall be your friend and make sure that Frigga the beautiful is presented to you as your bride.

            “I returned to Asgard to break the news to my brother. I found Thor fretting in his rooms and told him what I had learned. ‘Thrym has my hammer?’ Thor asked me. ‘He will only give it back if he has mother as his bride?’

            “‘Yes,’ I replied. ‘This can no longer remain a secret. We must tell father what has happened.’

            “Thor feared our father’s reaction and rightly so. Father loved mother more than anything in all the Nine Realms. We found our parents to tell them what had happened. Father’s anger shook the heavens. Mother was appalled, ‘I will not be bound to Thrym the ugly and live the remainder of my days within a gloomy mountain prison!’

            “I agreed with her, for I refused to lose my mother to the giant. It was Heimdall, our watchman, who presented a solution. ‘I have an idea. Let us dress Thor in the queen’s wedding gown, send him to Thrym and make the presentation of Mjölnir a condition of the marriage.’

            “Thor, as one would expect, blanched at the thought. ‘I shall not be the laughing stock of the Nine for dressing as a woman! I refuse, I will fight and die if I must but I _will not_ be dressed as a woman!’

            “‘But Thor,’ I said. ‘Should word get out that Mjölnir is in the hands of a giant, all of Asgard will be in danger. Thrym will call upon his fellow giants and they will make war against Asgard.’

            “‘You will do it,’ our father proclaimed. ‘For the good of Asgard, you will do this.’

            “Thor was not happy in the least. Preparations were quickly made. A dress fit for a queen was made for Thor, made of lace and pearls to flow beautifully around him. His hair was brushed and curled and a veil made of the finest gold and silks was placed upon his head. Nothing of his manly physique could be seen beneath the dress. The only thing that could be seen were his piercing blue eyes. Mother’s famous neckless was placed around Thor’s neck and as was custom a set of keys hung along his girdle.

            “Once he was dressed, I changed my appearance to a beautiful handmaiden as I would accompany my brother on his quest. I told Thor not to speak lest his deep voice give him away. We left for Vanaheim and made for Thrym’s castle. When we arrived Thrym and his family had done a poor job at decorating for the wedding.

            “Thrym was beside himself upon seeing Thor, whom he thought to be Frigga. ‘My bride!’ Thrym boomed. ‘Come my love, I have prepared a feast in your honor.’

            “We entered the castle, I knowing I would have to do something to keep Thor from revealing our deception. ‘I am so hungry,’ Thor whispered to me as in his fretting he had forgotten to take a meal.

            “‘Do nothing to give yourself away,’ I replied just as softly. We sat at the large table and I hoped we would make it through the feast with no problems.

            “Now leave it to Thor to never do anything by halves. In his hunger he ate a whole ox, eight salmon, and all of the sweets that had been put out for the ladies. He drank three barrels of mead. All of the giants watched in shock and awe as Thor put all of that food away.

            “‘I have never before seen a bride so hungry or thirsty,’ Thrym said.

            “‘I laughed it off. ‘My lady has eaten nothing at all in the last eight days, so eager was she to become your bride.’

            “Thrym believed the lie. When he tried to kiss Thor, he caught sight of his eyes through the veil and reared back. ‘Never have I seen a gaze so fierce,’ cried Thrym.

            “‘My mistress has not slept these past eight days, so excited was she for you.’

            “Again, Thrym was delighted by the news. ‘Bring forth the wedding gift!’ Thrym boomed. ‘Nothing less than the Hammer of Thor will suffice for my bride.’

            “The giants brought forth Mjölnir. Once she had been placed securely within Thor’s grasp, lightning shot out and sent Thrym flying across the hall. Thor ripped the dress off, much to the shock of the remaining giants. Thor wielded Mjölnir against the giants, vanquishing them all in retaliation for the theft.

            “I watched from the side for I knew it would be unwise to come between Thor and his vengeance. Once he was done, the giants were soundly defeated. We left the castle and with one mighty swing against a pillar, Thor brought the whole castle crumbling to the ground.

            “We returned to Asgard where Father ground Thor for a decade for losing Mjölnir and destroying mother’s wedding dress.”

            The story complete, Loki let his illusions dissipate. Morgan had been scratching behind his ear since about halfway through the story. He turned his gaze to her and allowed himself to begin purring. Morgan giggled at the sound.

            “I like that story. T’or looked funny,” she said.

            “He did,” Loki agreed. “If you are a good girl and go to sleep now I’ll let you see it for real.”

            “Really?” She yawned, her eyes drooping.

            “Really.”

            “‘kay.” She rolled onto her side and closed her eyes. “Night Ki, wuv you.”

            Loki stood, adjusted her blankets and placed a kiss on her head. “I love you too little one. Sleep well.” Loki stayed for another minute to make sure she was actually sleeping then slipped from the room, shutting the light off as he went.

            “I can see why Thor hates that story,” Tony said from the hallway.

            “You were eavesdropping for a while.”

            Tony shrugged, “Guilty but I’ve been trying to get that story out of one of you for years and I wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to hear it. All of that really happened?”

            “For the most part. I edited it for her. There was a bit more bloodshed than I’d told her.”

            Tony was clearly amused. “Thank you for not scaring her for life. You must be tired, that six hour time difference means it’s what, well into the morning for you.”

            Now that Tony had mentioned it Loki realized he was quite tired. “I think I will turn in. I’ll see you in the morning.” They said their good nights and Loki entered his guest room where he swiftly changed into his night clothes, crawled into bed and promptly fell asleep.

* * *

            The next morning Tony awoke to an empty bed. It was a rare occurrence that Pepper was up before he was. He yawned, stretched and got up to relieve himself. Once done he left the room and found Pepper outside of the room Loki was staying in. She had her phone out and appeared to be taking pictures.

            “What are you doing?” he asked.

            Pepper shushed him, placing a finger at her lips to tell him to be quiet then gestured for him to come see.

            Curious, Tony went to see what had her so happy. He glanced into the room and swore his heart instantly melted.

            Morgan must have woken up sometime in the night. Usually she would come into her parents’ bedroom to sleep with them but instead it appeared as if she had sought out Loki during the night. She was sprawled out across his back, one of her hands up by his head. Her fingers twitched, scratching behind one of his cat ears. Loki began purring.

            Tony fought hard to keep himself from laughing. “I still can’t believe he turned himself into a cat,” he whispered.

            “Morgan loved it,” Pepper whispered back. She handed him the phone where Tony could see she had taken many, _many_ pictures of the two.

            The other guest bedroom door opened and Thor stepped out. “Good morning,” he said.

            Quickly, he and Pepper shushed Thor, who looked just as confused as Tony had felt at first. They waved him over so he could see what they were looking at.

            Thor looked at the two sleeping figures and a grin spread across his face. “I hope you have taken pictures,” his voice was low enough that the others wouldn’t awaken. “I will definitely use this against him.” Thor looked excited at the thought. “It’ll serve him right for constantly telling that damn wedding story.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed. I couldn't resist Lokitty and Labrathor. The thought of that is just too cute.
> 
> So, the Wedding of Thor is my favorite tale from Norse mythology. I had to change some things since in the MCU Frigga and Freyia appear to be the same person and also since Jotunheim is off limits due to the treaty I changed the location to Vanaheim.


	6. Fifth Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The five year anniversary of the Snap looms. Loki receives a call from Tony saying there may be a way to reverse it. Hopes are lifted, plans are made and the brothers find themselves planning a trip through time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back into Endgame. Just a quick reminder, I've only seen the movie twice and that was around the time that it originally came out. I can't believe how much a single one-shot has blown up. 
> 
> I have mixed feelings about this chapter. I feel like it wasn't my best but I also wanted to try and keep it partly in line with the movie. Also, throughout this whole story I've tried to figure out a way to make Thor just a bit chubby but, alas, that didn't happen. He's had such a good support network that he hasn't completely turned into the Thor we saw in Endgame.
> 
> As for parts of the the dialogue, thank you Transcripts Wiki. 
> 
> Anyway all mistakes are my own and any glaring ones please let me know. For some reason I kept spelling Rogers's name as Rodgers. Hopefully I've found them all.

**Fifth Year**

            The ringing of his phone woke Loki. Groaning he blindly reached for it, the illuminated screen telling him it was just after one in the morning and the caller was Tony.

            “Somebody had better be dying,” Loki growled into the phone.

            “ _You’ll never guess who just showed up at my front door,”_ Tony said.

            Loki pulled the phone away to glance at the screen again before putting it back to his ear. “Tony, it’s one in the morning. Can’t this wait until later?”

            “ _What? Oh sorry, I didn’t think of the time difference._ ”

            Loki sat up and leaned back against the headboard. “You wouldn’t be calling this late if it wasn’t important. What’s going on Tony?”

            _“So, Steve, Nat and Scott Lang came for a visit. They said there might be a way to bring everyone back. They think they have a way to reverse the Snap. I told them they were crazy but they seemed like they were going to try anyway. They were trying to get everyone together again. Someone might come looking for Thor.”_

            Loki rubbed sleep from his eyes. The five-year anniversary of the Snap was coming up and Loki could already see how it was affecting his brother. “I don’t know who that last person is.”

            _“Lang? Yeah, he didn’t show up until after New York. That’s not the point though. I’m… I’m actually running some simulations now. I don’t expect it to actually work but it’s been bugging me ever since they left.”_

            “Tony, _what_ is this so-called plan?”

            _“Time travel.”_

            Loki sat up straighter. He pushed back his blankets and crawled out of bed. “Time travel?” he asked, not quite sure he’d heard right.

            _“I know, I’m skeptical too. Lang said he was stuck in something called the Quantum Realm for the past five years and for him it was only like, five_ hours. _His idea was to use the Quantum Realm to travel back in time to collect the Stones, bring them here and reverse the Snap. That’s not even touching on messing with the Planck Scale and the Deutsch proposition.”_

            “I don’t know what those are but I think I still understand what you’re saying. Time travel is possible in _theory_. I’d read about it in some of Asgard’s most ancient texts but every one of them warned about the dangers of doing so.”

            On the other end of the line, Tony sighed. _“I’m not too keen on it either to be honest but… Hypothetically speaking, say we do figure it out and are able to get the Stones from the past, we could get_ everyone _back.”_

Loki had crept silently downstairs and was currently pacing around the living room. “It still seems like an incredible risk. If you change the past too much…”

            _“That’s just it. We wouldn’t actually be changing the past. The whole premise was get the Stones, bring them here and do what we need to then return them to the exact point in time they were taken from.”_

Still, Loki was skeptical. “And if something goes wrong?”

            _“Alternate time line.”_ Even Tony didn’t sound quite certain about that. _“Either way, nothing in our current time would be changed by anything done in the past.”_

            Loki wasn’t so sure about that but it was a small sliver of hope that things could change. He stopped by the stairs, looking up towards Thor’s room. His brother blamed himself for things he could never have prevented. “Keep me informed and thanks for the warning.”

            _“No problem. Sorry for waking you up.”_

Normally Loki would have ribbed Tony but he just didn’t have the heart for it. “I’ll live and Tony, I do hope you’re successful.”

            _“I kind of am too but… Loki this is one thing I’m terrified of actually figuring out. I can’t lose Pepper and Morgan, I just can’t.”_

Loki felt a wave of fear flow though him at the thought. He couldn’t imagine losing the family he had gained nor the relationship he had with his brother. “You won’t,” he said with more conviction than he felt.

 _“I don’t even know what I’m worrying about,”_ Tony said flippantly. _“All of the models keep collapsing in on themselves. It’ll never work.”_

            Loki wasn’t sure which of them the other man was trying to convince. “Thanks for letting me know. If you do manage to figure out a working model I would like to see it.”

            _“Will do but like I said, I’m not holding my breath.”_

            They remained silent for a while, neither really knowing how to continue the conversation. Loki could feel his eyelids beginning to droop. “I’m going to go back to bed.”

            _“What? Yeah, sorry. Yeah, you do that. I’ll let you know if I find anything.”_

            “Good night Tony.”

            _“Night.”_

            Loki hung up and quietly made his way back up the stairs. As he passed Thor’s room, he stopped. His brother had left his door partly open and Loki could see the moonlight reflecting off some of the glass bottles that littered the floor. Thor’s drinking always escalated around the anniversary and this year was no exception. Loki hated it but all he could really do was be supportive and _try_ to keep Thor from drinking himself to death.

            Loki returned to his own room but in the end, he was unable to fall back asleep. He kept thinking about what Tony had said. Was it possible they could fix everything? The possibility gave him hope but Loki felt that might just be the worst part of it. His own hope was slowly growing at the prospect. He decided not to mention the phone call to Thor quite yet. He didn’t want to raise his hopes just yet because the he didn’t want to see the fallout of those hopes being dashed.

* * *

            It was a few days later that Tony called again and told him that not only had he found the right equation, he’d designed a fully functioning space/time GPS.

            Loki knew they would have to return to New York soon. Thor’s mood had not improved in the least and Korg and Meik had been spending more time over at the house lately. Loki wasn’t too happy about it but it had kept Thor from spending all of his time in bed.

            When Loki returned to the house, he found the front door wide open. Wary, he summoned a dagger to his hand and cautiously entered the house. He cursed under his breath when he heard what he thought was Banner’s voice. He entered the living room to find his brother ranting about the cable, Korg and Meik playing _Fortnite_ with Banner and Rocket looking extremely confused. This was not going to be a good day.

            “Boys!” Thor exclaimed. “Oh my God! How have you been?” He put down whatever drink he’d been holding. He went to embrace the raccoon. “Come here, you little rascal!”

            Rocket tried to back away. “No, I’m good. I’m good. That’s not necessary.” Rocket wasn’t able to get away and ended up in Thor’s embrace anyway.

            Once Thor had let him go, he gestured to the two lounging on the couch. “Hulk, you know my friends, Meik, Korg, right?”

            “Hey boys,” Banner waved.

            “And my brother... I don’t know where my brother is.” Thor finally caught sight of him. “Loki!” Thor threw his arm around Loki’s shoulders. “You remember Loki right?”

            “Uh yeah,” Banner replied awkwardly. “How are you doing?”

            “Could be better,” Loki replied. He scrunched up his nose in distaste when he caught a whiff of Thor’s breath.

            Suddenly Korg exclaimed, “Thor, he’s back! The kid on the TV that called me a dickhead again.”

            Thor let go of Loki and moved over towards Korg. “Noobmaster?”

            Korg nodded. “Yeah, Noobmaster69.”

            Thor reached for Korg’s headphones but Loki slapped his hand away before he could. “What was that for?”

            “I’m not going to let you harass some child,” Loki said.

            “He’s making fun of Korg,” Thor protested.

            “I don’t care. As a matter of fact,” Loki snapped his fingers and the whole console disappeared. He turned to the former gladiators. “You need to leave.”

            “But—” started Korg.

            “Now!”

            Silently Korg collected Miek. He called back, “See you later, mate,” as they left the house.

            Thor’s mood jumped back to being cheery. “So you guys want a drink?” he asked Banner and Rocket. He picked up another bottle. “What are you drinking? We have beer, tequila, all sorts of things.”

            Loki _knew_ he had removed all of the alcohol from the house before he’d left earlier to meet with the council. He spotted a keg and a number of different bottles of spirits. He was going to _kill_ Korg.

            Thor smacked his latest bottle against the mantle, the ‘tink’ of the cap hitting the hardwood following soon after.

            “Buddy, you all right?” Banner asked Thor.

            Before Thor could answer, Loki asked a question of his own. “How much have you had?”

            Thor burped. “Not nearly enough,” he said with a wide smile.

            Loki pressed his fingers against his temples, feeling a headache beginning to form. He glanced at their two guests. “You’ve caught my brother on a very bad day.”

            Thor rolled his eyes. “I’m fine. Why? Don’t I look all right?”

            “You look like shit,” Rocket answered drily.

            Thor laughed off his comment. “So, what’s up?”

            “We need your help,” Banner said, seemingly deciding to get straight to the point.

            “What, like the cable?” Thor asked, belching once more. “Cause that’s been driving me bananas for weeks.”

            “There’s nothing wrong with the cable,” Loki muttered. “I disconnected it.”

            Banner’s words stopped Thor in his tracks, “Like Thanos.”

            The happy-go-lucky smile that Thor had sported dropped, his expression becoming blank. “Don’t say that name,” Thor said softly.

            “Why not?” Loki asked, suddenly becoming angry. “I can say it.” He moved to stand before Thor. “Thanos. Thanos, Thanos, Thanos. I can say the bastard’s name and _I_ was the one he tortured.”

            From the corner of his eye, he saw Banner and Rocket exchange a look. “Look, I know he might scare you—”

            “Scare me?” Thor interrupted, backing away from Loki. “Why would... Why would I be scared of that guy? I’m the one who killed that guy, remember?” His gaze moved between the three of them. “Anyone else here killed that guy? Nope. Didn’t think so.” He moved around Loki and picked up another bottle. “I was the one who chopped Thanos’s big head off.”

            “I get it,” Banner said with a placating tone. “You’re in a rough spot, okay? I’ve been there myself. You wanna know who helped me out of it?”

            Thor once more smiled his crazed grin. “I don’t know. Is it... Natasha?”

            “It was you. You helped me.”

            Loki sighed, covering his face with one hand. “You couldn’t have called first?” Loki asked the two visitors, dropping his hand to cross his arms. “Maybe given me a few days to sober him up?”

            “There wasn’t time.”

            “Why not?” Loki’s frustration was reaching its breaking point. “You’re planning on using time travel for your plan. It’s been five years, what’s a few more days?”

            He received three sets of confused gazes. “How’d you know that?” Rocket asked.

            “I spoke with Tony earlier. He told me he’d figured out how to do it.” He turned his attention to Banner and Rocket. “That’s why you’re here isn’t it? You want Thor to help you gather the Stones so you can reverse the damage Thanos has done.”

            “I think we can bring them back,” said Banner.

            Thor slammed his drink down on the mantle. “Stop. Just, stop...” His breathing was becoming harsh and Loki could see Thor beginning to tremble. “I know you think I’m down here wallowing in my own self-pity, waiting to be rescued and saved. But I’m fine, okay? We’re fine,” he looked at Loki, “aren’t we?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “So, whatever it is that you’re offering, we’re not into it, don’t care, couldn’t care less. Goodbye.”

            Banner tried once more, “We need you, pal.”

            Thor continued to ignore him, grabbing his drink again and taking a long pull.

            Loki decided to try a different approach. “Thor,” he gently pulled the beer from Thor’s grip. “You’ve been blaming yourself for Thanos’s actions for years. No one is to blame for that creatures actions but himself.”

            “Well, he did miss,” Rocket said.

            Loki turned his glare on him. “Say one more word and I’ll turn you into a coonskin hat.”

            “But what if we fail?” Thor asked softly.

            “Then we fail.” Loki replied. “Which would be worse? Trying and failing or not trying at all?”

            Thor appeared to ponder Loki’s words. He let out a full body sigh. “When do we leave?

* * *

            Thor walked slowly to the large practice arena of the Avengers compound which currently housed the machine that would end up taking everyone through time. It was still in the process of being built. He was currently nursing the _mother_ of all hangovers. He silently cursed Loki for dragging him into this.

            Their arrival had had mixed reactions. While most everyone gathered had been indifferent to Loki’s presence, Barton’s reactions had been the most explosive, literally. He’d shot at Loki with an exploding arrow. Loki had not only blocked the arrow but had managed to send it far enough away that the explosion hadn’t harmed anyone. It had taken a _lot_ of convincing to get Barton to finally accept Loki’s presence. The archer had been more surprised by everyone else’s seeming acceptance of Loki, especially Tony. At least Barton hadn’t tried to kill his brother again.

            “Drifting left. On the side there Point Break,” Tony said, walking past him dragging a long cable. “How’s it going, Ratchet?” he asked the raccoon.

            “It’s _Rocket_ ,” Rocket replied snidely. He looked out from what he was working on underneath the platform. “Take it easy,” he said to Tony shoving the cable into place. “You’re only a genius on Earth, pal.”

            Tony didn’t seem to really hear him, “yup.” Satisfied the cable was where he wanted it to be Tony stopped, his brows furrowing in confusion before turning back to Thor. “What’s with the sunglasses?”

            Thor shrugged, “Nothing.”

            Tony didn’t look at all convinced. “Uh huh. How bad is it?”

            Thor feigned ignorance. “What?”

            “Your hangover? Loki said you’d been out of it lately.”

            Thor was glad Tony wasn’t going into too much detail. His PTSD was at the worst it’s ever been and his only real outlet, getting blackout drunk, had been taken from him. Part of him wanted to hate his brother for removing his access to alcohol but he understood why he did it. He also knew, logically, that he really needed to drink less.

            Eyebrow raised in skepticism, Tony moved over to him and swiped the sunglasses from his face. Thor flinched back from the sudden light, his eyes burning.

            Now both of Tony’s eyebrows shot up. “Yeah, sure, you’re fine. You only look like someone’s been pouring acid in your eyes but hey, you’re great.” He grabbed Thor’s arm and began to drag him away. “I’ll be back,” he called over his shoulder.

            Thor let the smaller man drag him along. He wished he could have his sunglasses back so he could block out the light but that didn’t seem like it was going to happen anytime soon. He resigned himself to being berated by not only his brother, but Tony as well.

            They walked to another nearby room where Banner, Rogers, Rhodey, Lang and his brother were preparing to run a test of some sort. Honestly, Thor hadn’t really been paying attention.

            Lang was wearing a tight red and silver suit, making adjustments to its fit.

            “Time travel suit?” Rhodey asked, “Not bad.”

            Banner did something near the belt of the suit that Thor couldn’t really see. Lang jumped, swiping something from Banner’s hand. “Hey, hey, hey! Easy, easy!”

            “I’m being very careful,” Banner said.

            “You’re being very Hulky,” Lang replied.

            From his place in the corner of the room Loki snorted. “He does have a point.”

            “I’m being careful.” Banner said again.

            Lang held up a small vile with something red inside it. “These are Pym Particles, alright?” He waved the vile in emphasis. “And ever since Hank Pym got snapped out of existence, this is it. This is all we have. We’re not making any more.”

            From the other side of the man, Rogers said, “Scott, calm down.”

            “Sorry,” Lang said with a sigh. “We’ve got enough for one round trip each. That’s it. No do-overs.” He placed the vile in a small pouch on the side of his belt. “Plus two test runs.” Suddenly Lang disappears then reappears a second later. His helmets visor lifted up and he looked embarrassed. “One test run,” he mumbled.

            Loki shook his head and seemed to finally notice Thor and Tony. “Everything alright?” he asked.

            Thor opened his mouth to answer but all eyes turned to him and it snapped shut. He saw Tony share a look with his brother and Loki sighed. “They were just getting ready to perform a test run,” Loki said, making his way over to them.

            “The machine was almost ready to go,” Tony said. “There were only a few finishing touches left to do.”

            From behind them Lang said, “All right.” He shuddered, “I’m not ready to do this.”

            “I’m game,” came Barton’s voice, “I’ll do it.”

            Thor turned to find Barton leaning nonchalantly against the door. Thor didn’t know what to make of the man’s haircut and he sported more tattoos than Thor remembered him having. Beside him, he felt Loki tense ever so slightly.

            “Okay,” Banner said.

            Lang let out a full-body sigh of relief, “Thank God.”

            “We’ll meet you at the platform,” Tony said.

            Together they followed Tony back to the other room. Loki sliding up to Thor and silently asking, “How bad is it?”

            “Nothing I can’t handle,” replied Thor.

            Loki stopped him with a touch to his arm. He turned to his brother and felt Loki place a palm against his forehead. Thor felt a cooling sensation wash over him. The familiarity of Loki’s seiðr giving him a comfort he hadn’t realized he’d needed. His pounding headache began to lessen as well.

            Thor hadn’t realized he’d closed his eyes until Loki said, “You’re running a slight fever. Maybe you should rest for a bit.”

            “I’m fine.” Thor felt like he’d been saying that a lot lately.

            Loki’s look of skepticism was well deserved. His brother sighed, looking away momentarily. “I know you still blame yourself for what happened and I feel like this is possibly giving you a false hope.” His shoulders sagged. “It’s giving everyone a false hope but right now it’s all we have.” Loki looked back up at him and met his gaze. “Promise me that if this does actually work that you won’t do something to get yourself killed.”

            Thor clearly heard the unspoken _don’t leave me alone_ that Loki’s body language screamed. “Only if you promise the same,” he replied.

            Loki’s lips twitched into his signature smirk. He shook his head. “Is that even really a problem? Not only would we have to deal with mother in Valhalla but we’d have Pepper chasing us down to beat us bloody.”

            Thor chuckled knowing Loki was right. In many ways Pepper had become like a second mother to them. It had been an unexpected development but not one that was unwelcome. They both felt more than comfortable with their extended family. Thor knew that neither he nor his brother would do anything to purposefully bring them any kind of pain.

            When they finally made it to the room with the Quantum Machine Barton had already changed into a Quantum Suit and was making some last minute adjustments to the fit.

            “Clint, now you’re gonna feel a little discombobulated from the chronoshift,” Banner said to the man as Barton took up a position on the machine. “Don’t worry about it.”

            He and Loki made their way over to where Tony, Rhodey and the others stood watching. Rhodey’s expression was thoughtful. “Wait a second, let me ask you something,” he said to the room. “If we can do this, you know, go back in time, why don’t we just find baby Thanos, and...” He made the gesture of using a garrote to strangle the imaginary Thanos.

            Banner’s eyebrows shot up. “First of all, that’s horrible.”

            “It’s _Thanos_ ,” replied Rhodey.

            “And secondly,” Banner continued as if Rhodey hadn’t spoken, “time doesn’t work that way. Changing the past doesn’t change the future.”

            “Look, we go back, we get the Stones before Thanos gets them... Thanos doesn’t have the Stones. Problem solved.” The way Rhodey said it was as if it was the most obvious solution.

            “Bingo,” Barton added from his position on the platform.

            Tony rolled his eyes, “That’s not how it works.”

            Crossing his arms Rhodey said, “Well, that’s what I heard.”

“What?” Tony asked in surprise. “By who? Who told you that?”

Rhodey began counting off on his fingers, “ _Star Trek, Terminator, TimeCop, Time After Time_ —”

“ _Quantum Leap_ ,” Lang interjected.

“ _A Wrinkle in Time, Somewhere in Time_ —” continued Rhodey.

            “ _Hot Tub Time Machine_ —” added Lang.

            “ _Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure_. Basically, any movie that deals with time travel.”

            “Die Hard?” Lang shook his head. “No, it’s not...”

            “This is known.”

            Banner gave an exasperated sigh. “I don’t know why everyone believes that, but that isn’t true. Think about it: if you travel to the past, that past becomes your future. And your former present becomes the past. Which can’t now be changed by your new future...”

            “Exactly,” Tony said.

Lang looked like his whole life had been a lie. “So... _Back To The Future_ ’s a bunch of bullshit?”

            “While that is a good movie,” Loki said, “all of you are wrong.”

            All heads turned to him. “What?” Tony and Banner asked at the same time.

            Loki stepped back and with a wave of his hand a representation of Yggdrasil manifested before them. Thor could clearly see where each of the Nine Realms lay, though Asgard was no longer present. Something Thor still felt a pang of loss at.

            “What you know of the cosmos is held together by the World Tree.”

            “Wait, like, an actual tree?” Lang asked.

            “Similar in concept,” Loki replied, “but it’s not an actual tree though there is a root out of which the rest of the cosmos forms. While there are things beyond Yggdrasil’s ‘branches’ most everything we interact with rests within.

            “What you understand as the Big Bang that created the universe as you know it started at what would be the roots of the tree.” The bottom portion of the ‘tree’ began to glow.

            “Now, time is not as linear as you think it is. There are ways to manipulate it but it can be very dangerous to do so. The plan to go back in time to gather the stones, by your theory, would create an alternate timeline should something go wrong.” Here more branches seemed to sprout from the root, potential new trees forming.

            “The Stones will to back to the exact moment they were taken once we’re done with them,” Tony said.

            Loki scratched at an eyebrow. “But what about the events leading up to the point in which you took the Stone in the first place? Let’s say, for the sake of argument, that something does go wrong and an alternate timeline is created,” one of the offshoots began to glow, “when the time comes that you bring the Stone back to when it was taken what happens to that alternate line?”

            “It would be as if it never existed,” Banner said.

            “Ah, but here is the flaw in your own logic,” Loki said. He pointed back to the image, “If you take the Stone back to the exact moment it was taken then from what you are saying, the timelines would merge.”

            “No, the alternate line would disappear,” said Tony.

            “You yourself said that nothing changed in the past would alter our present. In which case, anything you do in the past to obtain the Stone would, in effect, create an offshoot timeline, even when you put the Stone back. Say you to back to when I first arrived in New York and things don’t go as planned and I manage to get away? Do I remember an alternate life or will there be two versions of me running around?”

            Tony and Banner exchanged looks, clearly neither of them had thought of that. His brother had made some valid points. “What do you suggest?” Banner asked.

            Loki shrugged. “Honestly, I wish I knew.”

            “Then why even bring it up?” Tony asked.

            “Because you need to understand just how badly this could go,” Loki replied. “Each new timeline would create a new branch at Yggdrasil’s root. You create too many of them and…” the whole image collapsed in on itself.

            Tony groaned. “Great. World, no, _universe,_ ending paradoxes was not what I needed today.”

            “Does this mean we’re not going to do this?” Lang asked.

            “Nope,” Banner said, turning to Barton. _“_ Alright, Clint. We’re going in three... two... one!” The suit enveloped Barton and he vanished.

* * *

            Barton’s trip through time had yielded successful results, proving that what they had planned to do was possible. The next stage would be to plan out exactly where the prime time and location would be to collect each Stone and also who would be the ones to retrieve them.

            Currently, everyone was gathered in a meeting room where a projection of each Infinity Stone was displayed above the table in the center of the room.

            Rogers and Tony paced in front of a display of monitors mounted along the far wall. “Okay, so the ‘how’ works,” Rogers said. “Now we gotta figure out the ‘when’ and the ‘where’. Almost all of us has had an encounter with at least one of the six Infinity Stones.”

            Tony scoffed, “Well I’d substitute the word ‘encounter’ for damn-well-near-been-killed-by one of the six Infinity Stones.”

            “I haven’t,” Lang interjected. “I don’t even know what the hell you’re all talking about.”

            “I’m pretty sure I’ve encountered slash used more than anyone in this room,” Loki said.

            “Regardless,” said Banner, “we only have enough Pym Particles for one round trip each, and these Stones have been in a lot of different places throughout history.”

“Our history. So, not a lot of convenient spots to just drop in,” Tony said.

“Which means we have to pick our targets,” Barton said.

“Correct.”

Rogers stopped at the end of the table. “Let’s start with the Aether. Thor, Loki, what do you know?”

            Loki propped his elbow on the table and put his chin in his hand. “Thor would know more than I would since I was in a cell underneath the palace for most of it.” He leaned back in his chair and twisted to where Thor sat. “Brother?”

            Thor didn’t respond. “Is he asleep?” Romanov asked.

            Loki picked up a pen from the table and chucked it at his brother. It landed squarely on his forehead. Thor jerked up. “What?”

            Loki sighed, this was going to be one of his brother’s bad days. “The Aether. What do you remember of it?”

            “Oh,” Thor stood, moving to where the monitors were. “Where to start? Umm...” he glanced at the monitors which showed a glowing red stone. “The Aether, first, is not a stone, someone called it a stone before. It’s more of a... an angry sludge thing, so... someone’s gonna need to amend that.”

            Loki pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “Thor.”

            “Here’s an interesting story though, many years ago... My grandfather had to hide the Stone from the Dark Elves...” Thor continued as if Loki hadn’t spoken. He wiggled his fingers and made a sound to imitate a ghost. “Scary beings. So Jane,” the picture changed to an image of Dr. Foster. “Oh, there she is. That’s Jane...” he smiled and Loki felt like his brother was about to have a panic attack. He stood from the table and slowly made his way over.

            “...an old flame of mine... She... she stuck her hand inside a rock this one time...” Thor’s words were coming faster and faster. “…and then the Aether stuck itself inside her... And, she became very, very sick. So I had to take her to Asgard, which is where I’m from. And we had to try and fix her. We were dating at the time, you see. I got to introduce her to my Mother... who’s dead.” Thor stopped and his whole expression became blank for a moment. Then he bounced on the balls of his feet and continued. “And oh you know, Jane and I aren’t even dating anymore, these things happen though you know, nothing last forever.”

            “Thor, sit down.” Loki said.

            “I’m not done yet,” Thor protested.

            “Yes you are,” Tony said.

            Thor’s wild gaze roved around the room. “The only thing permanent in life is impermanence.”

            “Thor, stop.” Loki finally managed to get Thor to sit.

            “But I—”

            “You’re done.” He said to his brother. “The best time to get the Aether would be before the Dark Elves attack.” Loki turned his gaze to everyone else in the room. All but Tony’s expression angered him. They tried to hide it but Loki could see the accusation in their eyes. “Why are you really doing this?”

            Everyone, even Tony, looked back at him in shock. “We have a chance to fix this,” Rogers said.

            “You misunderstand me, why are _you_ doing this?”

            The others exchanged confused looks. “We owe it to everyone to undo what Thanos did.”

            Loki shook his head, running a hand down his face in exasperation. “Is that really it or are you just trying to ease your own sense of guilt?”

            “Hey, if anyone’s at fault for this, it’s blondie,” Rocket growled.

            Thor’s head lowered in shame and Loki felt his anger flare. He had half a mind to skin the damn animal. “Which is why you’ve picked _now_ to try this, after five years of doing _nothing._ What have you done with yourselves these past five years? Have you tried to move on or have you simply wallowed in your own self-pity? You’ve all known that my brother has blamed himself for this since the beginning. Never once have I heard any of you,” he pointed to each in turn, except for Tony, “say anything different. What, did you think that since he is a ‘god’ that he’s infallible?”

            Lang looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there. The rest of the so-called _Avengers_ exchanged looks. Rhodey shrugged, though he didn’t appear to really believe what he was about to say, “Isn’t he?”

            Loki blew a breath out his nose and forcefully reigned in his seiðr. “Take a moment to think about my brother’s state of mind at the time. Our home had just been destroyed, what little remained of our people had been culled further by Thanos and as far as he knew I was dead.” Loki gave a single shoulder shrug. “Granted I thought I was dead too but that’s beside the point. Thor wouldn’t have been rational in any way. Hel, he’d held open the iris of Niðavellir which could have killed him.

            “Thanos held all of the Stones. There was nothing, _nothing_ anyone could have done to stop him. The only one to blame for Thanos’s destruction is _Thanos._ Why do you refuse to see that?” They once more glanced at each other. Loki was glad to see them look sufficiently chastised.

            Tony, being true to form in a serious situation, clapped his hands together, “Awesome!” He exclaimed, looking at everyone, “Eggs? Breakfast?”

            Thor sat up straighter. “I’d like a Bloody Mary.”

            Loki smacked him.

* * *

            The next few days consisted of developing their plan. They had already located prime targets in which to pick up the Soul, Power and Reality Stones. The last three would be the trickiest.

            Loki glanced at the clock to see that it was well past midnight. Thor had finally gotten all of the alcohol out of his system and was currently sleeping. He’d had a few panic attacks over the past couple of days. Loki worried that they were only going to get worse. He hadn’t been sleeping well himself due to his worry over his brother.

            Loki entered the kitchen with plans of refilling his glass to find Tony and Romanov lying on top of the table surrounded by papers with Banner lying on the floor beside them. Tony had an arm covering his eyes but he lifted it enough to peek out at Loki as he passed. Loki gave him a small wave.

            “That Time Stony guy…” Romanov queried.

            “Doctor Strange,” Banner replied.

            Loki felt a flash of anger at the mention of the charlatan. He may have jerked the handle of the faucet a little too hard.

            “Yeah, what kind of doctor was he?” she asked.

            Tony groaned, “Ear nose and throat meets rabbit from a hat.” He lowered his arm and rolled partly onto his back. “Nice place in the village, though.”

            “Yeah. Sullivan Street. Hmm...” Banner said, then paused. “Bleecker?”

            Having refilled his glass, Loki made his way back over to the table. “The Sanctum is in New York?” Loki asked.

            Tony and Romanov looked over at him. “Yeah,” Tony replied. “Bleecker Street.”

            Loki put his glass down by Tony’s head. “If he lived in New York…”

            Romanov seemed to pick up on his train of thought. “Then if we pick the right year, there are three Stones in New York.”

There was a moment of stunned silence then Banner sat up. “Shut the front door,” he exclaimed.

            “Was Strange even there at the time?” Tony asked.

            “Even if he isn’t, the Sanctum is,” Loki replied. “The Time Stone was guarded for millennia by a being known as the Ancient One. Even if Strange isn’t there, she should be.”

            “How do you know that?” Romanov asked.

            Loki shrugged. “Asgard’s libraries were vast and I loved to read.”

            “That’s it then,” Banner said, slowly standing. “We’ve found them all.”

            “Finally,” Tony said, swinging his legs off the table and stretching. “Now comes the fun part.” Loki retrieved his glass before Tony could knock it off the table. He clasped Loki’s arm. “You’re a genius. I love you.”

            Loki snorted. “You’re married and I’m not interested.”

            Loki could almost hear Tony’s brain sputter to a stop. He laughed, “Shut up jerk.”

            “Bitch.”

            Now Tony dropped his head with a groan. “You’re not allowed to watch TV anymore.”

            He looked over Tony’s shoulder to see Banner and Romanov watching them with equal looks of confusion but neither said anything. Loki didn’t bother to explain it to them. “Now what?”

            Tony stood, gathering up some of the papers. “We put on the final touches and get this show on the road.”

            “I was thinking maybe sleep would be in order. No one will be of any use if we’re all exhausted.”

            “Hm, good point.” Tony headed out of the kitchen. Loki followed to make his way back to his own room. Tony stopped him in the corridor leading to the berthing. “Hey, can I ask you something?”

            “I think you just did.”

            Tony sighed, “Stop being an ass. Seriously though,” he crossed his arms, “if… If after all is said and done and I… I don’t make it, will… Will you and Thor watch over Pep and Morgan?”

            Loki sipped at his water to give himself a moment. “You don’t even need to ask me that. We’ll watch over them but you have nothing to worry about. You’ll be fine. Really if anyone should stay out of this, it’s you.”

            “Yeah, you’re probably right but I’ve never been one to do as I was told.”

            “Neither am I,” Loki said with a smile. “Must be why we get along so well.”

            “I am glad I got to know you.”

            “Me too and now that we’ve had that maudlin conversation, I’m going to bed.” He and Tony said goodnight and Loki finally returned to the room he was sharing with Thor. His brother was, thankfully, still asleep. Loki crawled in beside Thor and he felt a flash of anxiety flow through him. He felt himself beginning to tremble at the thought of what they would be doing in just a short time.

            Loki curled up on his side. He was able to admit to himself that he was afraid of what was to come. There was so much that could go wrong and the pessimist in him kept his thoughts circling to the worst case scenarios.

            Behind him, the bed shifted and suddenly Thor’s arm wrapped around his front. Thor pulled Loki to him though Loki wasn’t sure his brother was even awake. It was enough to calm Loki’s nerves though. His muscles relaxed and he allowed himself to finally fall asleep.

* * *

            The following morning saw the finalization of the plans, team makeups and assignments. Tony had handed out a watch containing a Quantum Suit to everyone along with the Pym particles.

            Loki watched Thor and was glad to see that his brother seemed to be in higher spirits. Thor looked thin to Loki’s eyes and he hoped that once all of this was over that Thor could continue to heal.

            The time had finally come for them to leave. Everyone stood in a circle on the platform, Loki brushed shoulders with Thor and received a small smile in return.

            Rogers cleared his throat. Loki felt like there was about to be an inspirational speech. _How cliché,_ he thought.

            “Five years ago, we lost.” Rogers began. 

            _Called it,_ Loki thought.

            “All of us. We lost friends... We lost family... We lost a part of ourselves. Today, we have a chance to take it all back. You know your teams, you know your missions.” Rogers made eye contact with all of them. “Get the Stones, get them back. One round trip each. No mistakes. No do-overs. Most of us are going somewhere we know. But it doesn’t mean we should know what to expect.  Be careful. Look out for each other. This is the fight of our lives. And we’re gonna win.” The man’s gaze locked with Tony’s. “Whatever it takes. Good luck.”

            From beside them Rocket said with a hint of awe, “He’s pretty good at that.”

            Lang bounced once in excitement, “Right.”

            “All right. You heard the man.” Tony said. He called down to Banner who stood before the controls. “Stroke those keys, Jolly Green.”

            Banner pressed a few more keys and the machine began to activate. “Tractors engaged.”

            Rocket moved away from them to hand something to Barton. “You promise to bring that back in one piece, right?”

Barton took the item and tucked it away. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I’ll do my best.”

Sarcastically the raccoon replied, “As promises go, that was pretty lame.”

            “You ready brother?” he asked Thor

            “As I’ll ever be,” Thor replied.

            Loki vaguely heard Romanov say something. He grabbed his brother’s hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Thor squeezed back just as their helmets closed, the floor dropped out from under them and the Quantum Realm sped by.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for sticking with me. This is the final chapter of this particular part. I don't know when I'll have the next part up but I hope it'll be soon. It all depends on what life throws at me.


End file.
